Last year I debuted my completely un-original list of things to look for in March Madness. While some predictions worked out well (telling you Illinois was an obvious 5/12 upset candidate) others were…not so much (my Seminoles making a sneaky deep run).

So this year, with another year of research under my belt, I am feeling even more confident. I have started reading anything and everything to prep for dominating Turner and Shadow once again in our bracket challenge but I don’t want to have other’s analysis impact this list so without further adieu here are 32 things to keep in mind as you fill out your brackets and prepare for the glories of Basketball Festivus.

1.  Last year I bragged on FSU and they lost in the first round. Let’s go with the opposite approach this year: if a team scores more than 70 points on FSU, FSU is done. Gonzaga averages 77 points/game. Do your own math.

2.  Of course if enough upsets happen we could see a Florida State vs. Florida game for a trip to the Final Four – how awesome would that be? Then the Gators could suit up Tim Tebow, who would trade in his eye-black for a shoulder tattoo of biblical passages. At this point it could only help his NFL draft stock.

3.  Wofford made its first ever March Madness this year which will lead to a horrendously painful ‘Woe-fford’ pun by Dick Enberg when they fall behind Wisconsin by 20.

4.  Experience matters in the NCAAs. Therefore look for good things from Villanova’s Scotty Reynolds, finishing his 9^th season in the Wildcats lineup.

5.  Your 2009-2010 Tyler Hansbrough award winner for most mentions of his ‘gutsiness’ and ‘toughness’ as code words for ‘big, awkward white guy who tries hard’: Luke Harangody.

6.  The last two years has seen an SEC team sweep through a weak conference tournament to a surprising tournament berth (08- Georgia, 09- Mississippi State). With the Bulldogs loss yesterday, the mantle of ‘team most obviously primed for a let-down’ goes to Washington who won a weak Pac-10 conference tournament Saturday.

7.  Washington narrowly edged out San Diego State for this honor.

8.  The worst first round game will be between Texas and Wake Forest – two teams that only got into the tournament due to their performance in December and January and combined for 11 losses since February 1.

9.  Actually, that could be a really entertaining game: two equally craptastic teams. Assuming they both stay on the court for the entire 40 minutes, that is. They have both faded so badly, just walking out before the games ends is really the only way left for them to further quit on this season.

10.  Clemson and Missouri should thank Texas and Wake for drawing attention from their equally uninspiring play.

11.  On a more inspiring note, I love when a small school gets to play a bigger in-state neighbor. Nothing like being passed over by your competition to get you fired up. Expect an inspired Sam Houston State effort in the first half but Baylor will pull it out by 5-7 points when SHSU wears down in the end.

12.  I am glad that John Scheyer’s parents got so much face time celebrating Duke’s ACC tournament victory this past weekend. At least they will have one last happy memory to finish their son’s career on.

13.  Time to insert my annual warning against picking Duke to win it all. Do you really trust a team with no real inside presence that relies heavily on outside shooters to win it all? Can they put together six straight games of high percentage outside shooting? If you wonder what a big team with a good inside game can do to them – check out the box score of their game at Georgetown earlier this season.

14.  That said, apparently Dick Vitale chaired the selection committee this year because this seeding was an absolute gift to Duke who has by far the weakest region. I don’t trust Duke but when their top competition is Baylor and Villanova it is scary to pick against them as well.

15.  Speaking of annual warnings: You can dismiss Big Ten basketball as being slightly more exciting than high school women’s curling but never underestimate Tom Izzo and Michigan State in the tournament. The guy has taken more ‘sub-optimally talented’ teams further than any coach in the land. He is the anti-Rick Barnes

16.  That was written last year – before Izzo took another team to the championship game. Beating Kansas along the way.

17.  Michigan State could play Kansas in the Sweet Sixteen this year.

18.  If Kansas makes it out of their region they should be national champs. They could potentially have to beat Michigan State and Ohio State or Georgetown just to make it to Indy. If they can make it that far, the rest should be smooth sailing.

19.  It is too bad Ohio State and Kansas could play before the Final Four. After the last week, I am convinced that Evan Turner refuses to lose and has the potential to single-handedly take over games when necessary. He is the Kobe of this tournament. I don’t care who he is playing with I don’t want to bet against him.

20.  The Big East will either be the dominant conference of the tournament and get multiple teams to Indy, or will be exposed as a fraud on scale with Bernie Madoff. The pressure is on Villanova, West Virginia and Georgetown to play above their seeds or we have to start questioning the conventional wisdom of the Big East’s strength.

21.  Murray State will barely edge out Robert Morris as the school that causes the most Google searches to find out where it is located

22.  But that is only because people will still be Googling Murray State on Saturday. If you know what I mean.

23.  The two most obvious 5/12 upset candidates are Cornell over Temple and Utah State over Texas A&M. One of these upsets will happen and the other will be a blow out by the favorite. I say Cornell wins and Utah State gets blown out.

24.  If you’re gonna be a bear, be a grizzly: Cornell, sweet sixteen.

25.  Much like John Calipari’s Memphis teams, Kentucky’s youth will be its Achilles heel. They found a way to pull out a number of close contests in the mediocre SEC but at some point they won’t get the final tip-in they need.

26.  There is no chance all four #1 seeds make it to Indy, despite what the experts say. Have there ever been #1 seeds with more questions? Kansas’ history, Syracuse’s health, Duke’s talent and Kentucky’s youth could all be their downfalls.

And finally, a couple history lessons to keep in mind:

27.  Remember all those years when Memphis would feast on a pathetic Conference-USA line-up and end up with a seed much higher than they deserved? Ladies and gentlemen your 2009-10 UTEP Miners.

28.  Although UTEP didn’t get a high seed, expect a lot of people to pick the upset over Butler. Butler has been here before. UTEP hasn’t.

29.  In 2000, Cincinnati was led by player of the year Kenyon Martin. Entering their conference tournament the Bearcats were the #1 team in the country. In the first game of the Conference USA tournament Martin broke his leg and was done for the season. The Bearcats were dropped to a #2 seed in the NCAAs and lost to Tulsa in the second round.

30.  Try Googling ‘Robbie Hummel’ and ‘Purdue’ this year and draw your own conclusion

31.  Last year Ty Lawson’s bum ankle cost the Tar Heels the ACC tournament and was the big question hanging over UNC coming into the NCAA tournament leading some leading pundits (cough, cough) to not pick UNC to win it all. Ty ended up being healthier than anyone expected and UNC cruised to a title

32.  In a completely unrelated note, Syracuse big man Arinze Onuaku hurt his knee in the Orange’s Big East tournament loss to Georgetown. All indications are that the injury isn’t serious but questions remain leading many to pick against the Orange. You have been warned.

In a week with more than one football game every single day (with most of them not involving a MAC team for once), it seemed only appropriate to send out 2009 with a special two-part Hierarchy of Hate. Today, we tell you who to cheer for in the Bowl games and follow it up later this week with the picks for the final weekend of NFL football.

With all of these bowl games there are a lot of teams you may not know much about and therefore are not clear as to whether you cheer for or against. You don’t want to make the rookie mistake of inadvertently cheering for a team full of criminals led by a coach completely full of himself. Sure, you could just not cheer for Tennessee and minimize the chance this happens but that isn’t nearly as fun as following our guidance in the THH.

As has become my own little holiday tradition, we are picking this year’s bowl game match-ups based on college football and bowl game history. Because if there is anything we should keep in mind heading into a new year it is that those who don’t know history are destined to repeat it.

Therefore, here is your college football history edition THH. The instructions are simple. Pick your team based on how you answer each question.

(Note: All years based on regular season, not the year of the bowl game – for all of you anal rule sticklers out there.)

Shadow: Does anyone else find it interesting that in the wake of SMU returning to a bowl, and winning it no less, that Craig James is in the spotlight this week at the center of the Mike Leach firing?  Interesting footnote gleaned from his Wikipedia page:  his real name is Jesse.  Seriously.  Really.  Maybe outlaws are revered in Jacksonville (TX), but in my opinion, certain names need to be removed from eligible parental selection (see:  Manson, Charles; Bundy, Ted; Weed, Richard).  But I digress.  We are supposed to be here commenting on Bowl Season, and I am stoked that in a little less than a week I can either be on top of the world with Iowa finally breaking through and winning a BCS bowl game, or I can be preparing some sort of vigorous defense against Super Dave’s eventual Big-Slow-Big 10 versus Lithe-Fast-ACC/SEC argument.  At least Wisconsin managed to shock the world and beat the Hurricanes.  Score one for Big-Slow Midwestern schools.  BTW, one last SMU note, and I will be the first to admit (and have to Turner and SD several times) that I am very bad at knowing where NFL players went to college if it wasn’t Iowa….but I had no idea that Craig James and Erik Dickerson shared the same backfield and were nicknamed the “Pony Express”.   I really love the Internet…now if I could only get one of those new fangled iPhone thingies so I could look up random junk on Google no matter where I was. 

Alabama vs. Texas: better national championship upset: 1992 Sugar Bowl or 2005 Rose Bowl

SD: I have been thinking about that 1992 Sugar Bowl a lot lately, with the recent ESPN documentary on The U bringing back to mind those late 80’s/early 90’s Cane teams. One of things that most bothered me about the documentary was its faulty conclusion that the 1991 team really signified the end of the Cane dynasty. That, to me, is revisionist history seen through rose-colored glasses. It completely ignores the 1992 team that dominated the entire season and was viewed just as unstoppable as all the previous Cane teams. That 1992 team even gave us the Gino Torretta Memorial Heisman – which is no small feat by itself. That 1992 Alabama team was just a nice story – the resurrection of the once-mighty Crimson Tide for a surprise trip to the National championship where though being the popular sentimental favorite of old-timey sportswriters nostalgic for Bear Bryant they would be wiped out by the mighty Canes. Thankfully, this Tide team didn’t care about history and went out and dominated the Canes. While Vince Young and the Longhorns beating the USC team that had won the previous title over Oklahoma by a score of 437-4 (approximately) was surprising, the Trojans hadn’t approached the level of dominance those Canes teams had. Sorry, Texas – Roll Tide!

Turner: It has to be the running Vince Young’s on this one.  While Miami was a favorite to win, the Crimson Tide had run the SEC and won the first ever SEC Championship game.  Meanwhile, the MIGHTY USC Trojans couldn’t be beat.  The Longhorns were a 1 dimensional team that couldn’t stay on the field with USC.  Vince Young (puke) proved them otherwise.  Despite my credit to UT on this one, I’ll go against SD’s direction and hope that Alabama kicks the holy *******  *******  ******** ******* out of Texas. I HATE THEM.  HATE HATE HATE HATE.  I hope Bama shoves things so far up Jordan Shipley’s a$$ that Colt won’t be able to access it for years.

Shadow: Any game that can shed a harsh light on the travesty that is the Heisman voting (I am also looking at you Jason White in the 2004 Sugar Bowl) is something I like to see.  It was fun to see Gino and his Hurricane mates suck against Bama.  However, the 2005 Rose Bowl will always be one of those games that springs to mind when I think of truly great games that I have watched.  I had some personal hatred going into the game because of what USC did to Iowa in 2002, but it was just an awesome game that had virtually everything a college football fan could want (including some great defensive plays, despite a game featuring 79 points scored).  For that reason, I will actually have to pull for Texas….in one of the few scenarios SD probably could have come up with to make me lean that way.

Arizona vs. Nebraska: More enjoyable defeat of the Miami Hurricanes in a Bowl Game: 1993 Arizona Desert Swarm in Fiesta Bowl or 1994 Nebraska in the Orange Bowl

SD: People forget this now but for the longest time the Cornhsukers were the Buffalo Bills of the NCAA. Between a title in 1971 and their Orange Bowl win after the 1994 season, the Huskers seemed to always be in the national title hunt yet always fall short. Whether it was the Canes stopping them on that 2 point conversion in 1984 or FSU beating them in the 1993 national title game the Huskers always rode a weak schedule and Tom Osborne’s popularity to high rankings before ultimately losing in a marquee bowl game. Not sure about you, but I like the story of lovable losers. Just think how unsufferable Charlie Brown would have been if Lucy had let him kick that football. Every sport needs the ‘close but not quite’ team. Look at what has happened in baseball since the Red Sox won in 2004. I am cheering for Arizona. The desert swarm was a humorous side story for one season, before the Wildcats returned to their rightful place as a basketball only school. You know how, when baseball players first come up to the majors, they have an inordinate amount of success until the major league pitchers see enough of them to know how to pitch them? Those couple weeks of great hitting were the 1993 Arizona football team. I will take a fluke over the end of a long suffering fan base any day.

Turner: First off, this was back when the Fiesta Bowl was the “IBM OS/2 Fiesta Bowl”… I am so f***** old.  I do remember the desert swarm shutting out The U.  That was certainly great but being from Big XII country and HATING everything that Miami stood for (because they beat the crap out of OU every year in the Orange Bowl), I was really rooting for Neb in this one.  I had / have so much respect and admiration for Tommie Frazier and that running offense, plus knowing that Cory Schlesinger would be subjected to years in Detroit made it even a better story. R.I.P. Brooks Berringer (why Kyle Orton wears #8)  Good ol’ Tom Osborne got his National Championship and the U got sent home (albeit just a few miles away)

Shadow: Another set of Hurricane letdowns.  Although I would like to reward Nebraska under gutsy heralded Brooks Berringer, I just can’t overlook a defense that ended Miami’s 15 year run without being shut out.  I guarantee there is no way anyone in the Miami locker room thought they couldn’t score on Arizona…Desert Swarm or no Desert Swarm.  It is always fun to watch Miami lose, and especially nice to see them shut out.

Northwestern vs. Auburn: which team was a better Cinderella story: 1993 Auburn or 1995 Northwestern

SD: It is lost to the annals of time now, but Terry Bowden almost became the black sheep of the Bowden family a decade before Jeff Bowden ultimately did. In Terry’s first season coaching Auburn he led his team to an undefeated season, which could have in theory kept FSU from playing for the national title and winning Bobby his first national title. Thankfully, like most SEC schools Auburn was cheating. Unfortunately, unlike most SEC schools, they were caught and on probation that season. The 1995 Northwestern team was more like the 1993 Arizona team. An anomaly of a team for a school known for things other than football. Interestingly, while the Auburn team was on probation, this Northwestern team was coached by Gary Barnett who would help change the expectations of all campus hostesses while at CU years later by installing a culture that could be most charitably described as Bunny Ranch-esque. I can’t reward that kind of behavior. Well, unless benefitting directly from it. Instead, in honor of Terry’s memory I will cheer on Auburn. I guess those poor kids from Northwestern will have to make themselves feel better by getting high paying jobs and spitting on the Auburn grads, cleaning their wastebaskets each night.

Turner: This one has to be the ’95 NW Wildcats.  While Auburn did unexpectedly go undefeated and beat two top 11 teams (‘Bama and UF), they had tradition, a decent recruiting base, and at least the facilities and players to compete.  Meanwhile the tiny NW Wildcats showed up with an actor for a RB (Darnell Autry) and the fierce Pat Fitzgerald at LB they were almost destined to even with the Rose Bowl.  This team sticks out in my mind as being glued to the Rose Bowl just hoping that the small / smart school could pull it off (please note, I was at SMU at this time so I was living through NW this season).  Plus, them beating Mighty Notre Dame just makes every season a success for me

Shadow: Auburn

I had never thought about it before, but it seems pretty obvious now. The Athletic Directors of the major conferences that make up the BCS are fans of 1990’s rap. Whether it was Deion Sanders’ ”Must be the Money” or P. Diddy/Puff Daddy’s “All about the Benjamins”, the AD’s that decide the BCS bowls clearly only care about making money for themselves and their major conference constituents.

It is no secret that after the BCS Title game, all other bowl games are typically slotted based on maximizing the revenue of the individual bowls. Teams with large, active fan bases or teams with major national followings always get the nod over the up-and-coming, unknown feel-good story (see: Notre Dame, BCS appearances: 2005, 2006). However, this year the AD’s not only set up the bowls to make money this year but they also went to an extraordinary effort to ensure that those pesky non-BCS conference teams are marginalized as much as possible.

I am speaking specifically about the Fiesta Bowl match-up of Boise State and TCU. This is the biggest cop out in the history of the BCS. Every year we have a team or two from the non-BCS conferences that argue they are as good as the big boys. This year we have two of those. Yet, rather than matching them against BCS conference foes to help settle the debate, the geniuses at the BCS committee matched them up against themselves which proves….well nothing except that the BCS committee is scared to death of their mighty conferences getting taken down by another upstart.

After seeing Bama trounced by Utah last year and Boise’s miracle against OU a few years ago, the last thing the BCS committee needs is another proof point that says they can’t treat the WAC and Mountain West as second class citizens. If pollsters and the public begin to believe that those conferences have teams as strong as the major conferences, then the BCS committee fears the day when we will be arguing for a one-loss BYU team over a two-loss USC or Florida team.

Given that the members of the BCS represent those very same major conference teams, it is obviously in their best interests (of their conferences and the guys who want to keep their jobs) to get as many major conference teams in – which means keeping non-major conference teams out. If it is proven that those teams are as strong as the major conference teams, then the BCS as set up spirals into self-destruction. What happens to their precious BCS championship if TCU goes into the Sugar Bowl and routs an uninspired, disjointed and dispirited Florida team?

No, the only way to ensure that the non-BCS teams remain second class citizens and therefore can be routinely overlooked and marginalized is to just pit them against each other. Then the winner of that game is no more important than the winner of the Best Supporting Actor Oscar.

For the record, I think Boise State would get trounced by any of the other major conference BCS teams – sort of like Hawaii a couple years ago; they played an incredibly weak schedule and gave up way too many points.

But I sure would like to be able to prove it.

On to some other thoughts from Championship Saturday:

- Obviously we have to start with UF/Bama. I can’t remember a more dominating performance by a college team over another highly ranked team. There was literally only one time in the entire game where I thought UF would win. After UF scored to make it 12-10 Bama, I made the assumption that this is when UF takes over and Bama folds like a cheap lawn chair. But on the next offensive play, Mark Ingram took a perfectly called screen pass 69 yards and Bama scored a play later. After that, UF never had a chance, the Tebow Crying group was formed on Facebook and I spent all Monday morning trading emails with funny pictures of Tebow crying on the sidelines. Really, it was a perfect game in every way.

- This despite the best efforts of Gary Danielson. They often say Tebow wills his team to victory. On Saturday, Danielson was the one willing the Gators. For three quarters, he kept claiming this game was similar to last year’s when Bama lost a 3-point lead going into the 4^th quarter. Except this time it was a 13-point lead and Bama had been utterly dominant on both offense and defense the entire game. Other than that, it was the exact same Gary.

- Mark Ingram will probably win the Heisman this weekend but shouldn’t it be taken into consideration that (1) he wasn’t most the important reason Bama won this game and (2) there is a decent chance he isn’t the best player at his position on his own team. After watching Alabama the last two weeks, I am convinced if Tony Richardson was given the ball instead of Ingram, he would have as good if not better stats than Ingram. Can we really reward a guy with the Heisman for just being first string?

- While Ingram is at the podium next weekend in New York I hope he thanks his quarterback and offensive coordinator. This game was won by Greg McElroy’s flawless playing and the play-calling of offensive coordinator Jim McElwain. McElroy did more than was asked of him, making perfect passes and even taking off on two clutch runs that may have been the difference in the game (or as only Gary Danielson would say “he out-Tebowed Tebow”). Combine his flawless execution with McElwain’s play-calling and UF never had a chance. The UF defense was unprepared the entire game – except for one Wildcat play in the first quarter that (not so coincidentally) led to a three and out by Bama. After that play, UF never knew what was coming. Each new drive brought a new wrinkle and UF was reacting one step late all day.

- Each year there is a question of conference superiority and each year I argue against the SEC. Well, I may need to change that stance this year. Did you see that halftime contest of throwing footballs into giant Dr. Pepper cans? At the SEC game, a female med student from Bama hit 9 of 10 to beat a taunting, idiot from Gainesville (is there any other kind?) who made 8. In the Big Twelve game later, a woman from Nebraska won by making 2 over a woman from Texas who made zero.  9 to 8 versus 2 to 0? That sums up the SEC versus the Big Twelve better than I ever could.

- Speaking of the Big 12, am I the only one that was underwhelmed by Texas needing a last second field goal to beat a team with possibly the worst offense in America? Seriously, Nebraska had a better chance of winning if they had just punted on first down every time they got the ball to get their defense back on the field. The Bizarro Bama offense combined poor execution (my 70-year old mother has a more accurate arm than Zac Lee) with poor play-calling. Isn’t the definition of insanity doing the same thing over again and expecting a different result? Then what do you call a coordinator who calls the same off-tackle running play, 3 times every offensive series for an entire game when it didn’t work once?

- Last week, a local columnist here in Denver wrote an article arguing that Nebraska defensive lineman Ndamukong Suh deserves the Heisman. I thought it was just precious – like when a little girl asks for a Unicorn for Christmas. That changed on Saturday night, when Suh took over the Big Twelve title game. Really his only two mistakes were not lobbying to come in to play quarterback for Nebraska and rushing McCoy on that final play. If he hangs back, McCoy absolutely runs the clock out. The imminent Suh sack was the only reason McCoy threw the ball out of bounds when he did, saving the one second Texas needed to make it into the title game.

- The other Heisman trophy candidate who really stood out to me on Saturday was C.J. Spiller. If a Heisman candidate rushes for 230 yards and 4 touchdowns in a conference title game and no one sees it, did it actually happen? How mad is C.J. today that someone decided the schedule the ACC title game opposite the Big Twelve title game? He has a true statement game, and yet I am pretty sure no one outside the Atlanta/Clemson corridor watched more than a snap.

- I guess rather than complaining about all the deserving players that won’t win the Heisman (see: Suh, Ndamukong; Gerhart, Toby; Spiller, C.J., Ponder, Christian…ok, just testing to see if you are paying attention), we should congratulate Mark Ingram on being the first running back to win a Gino Torretta memorial ‘best player on the best team’ Heisman award this year. Groundbreaking indeed.

And only fitting that our Heisman trophy winner, much like our BCS Title game, was chosen more based on uniform than qualifications.

Achilles was an ancient Greek warrior. The son of King Peleus and the Nymph Thetis, his mother decided upon birth to make him immortal by dipping him in the River Styx. Unfortunately for him, his mother had to hold on to him and chose to grasp him by his ankles while being dipped. Thus, his ankle was sheltered from the waters of the river and remained mortal.

Naturally, in the midst of a battle during the Trojan war, an arrow struck him in his mortal ankle and he died. What is not explained by Homer in his re-telling of this story in the Illiad is how an arrow to the ankle is fatal, though obviously extremely painful (see that scene in the movie Pet Sematary and see how you react when Mr. Munster gets a scalpel to that heel from that little kid under the bed).

This ancient story has had several effects on society today. The tendon running down the back of our heel is still called the Achilles; the mere thought of the severing (or the gloriously, icky technical term ‘rupture’) of the Achilles makes grown men weak and the band Styx is now considered immortal.

One of these is not true.

It also has one other outcome, one that is a little more pertinent to our discussion today than the band that brought us Come Sail Away. A person’s or team’s weakness is often referred to as their Achilles Heel.

Watching football this weekend, I realized that all the great college and pro teams have a weakness. Whether an opponent ever exploits it or not, it is there. Keep that in mind each time they enter a battle for the rest of the season.

Let’s cover the college kids today, and return in a day or so with the pros

Florida – Even as the Gators defeat of Mississippi State this past week seemed inevitable from the opening kick-off, the fact that the worst team in the SEC (located in Starkville, the most depressing, yet accurately descriptively named college town in the country) hung with them for most of the game, demonstrated that the Gators aren’t invincible. In short, a poor offensive line has a domino-like effect on the rest of their offense. Defenses are stacking the line to shut down the inside running game that the Gators live on but unlike in previous years, they don’t have the playmakers to get open downfield. Tebow also doesn’t have the time to wait, as he is constantly scrambling and running for his life. The only offensive weapon to counteract this – the 3-step drop, rhythm passing game – seems to be as gone from Gainesville as Dan Mullen – coincidence?

Not so coincidentally this also exposed Tebow’s biggest weakness – his inability to let a play go and live to play another day. Having so much success for so long, Tebow refuses to give up on a play, scrambling from rushers, forcing passes, etc. This ends up leading to the occasional Gary Danielson pants-wetting play but it also leads to turnovers. The really great quarterbacks get rid of the ball and turn a 10 yard sack into an incompletion rather than a 100-yard interception for a touchdown.

Apparently when Tebow was dunked in the River Styx he was held by his brain.  

Alabama – Much like their SEC compatriots down in Gainesville, the Tide’s weakness rests on the offensive side. Frankly, they have an inexperienced quarterback and don’t seem to be able to pass the ball effectively. As defenses increasingly shut down Mark Ingram running the ball, the pressure comes on Greg McElroy to move the chains with his arm. With blanket coverage on He-man Julio Jones can he do that? Against a mediocre Tennessee team, he certainly didn’t. How will he do against LSU and Florida?

Sidenote: A quick tangent. When did a 40+ yard field goal become a gimme? A week after the Vikings nearly blew a game by trying to run out the clock to kick a 40-yard field goal with 2 minutes to play. This week, Tennessee gets to around the 30 yard line with over 30 seconds left and rather than taking a couple shots to shorten the field goal attempt for their shaky kicker (who already had a blocked FG and a missed 47-yarder on the day), they just stood around and let the clock run. Why? Contrast that with Clemson who was in the exact same situation 30 minutes later. The tigers kept the momentum going and got down to the 10-yard line for real gimme field goal that propelled them to OT where they beat THE U. Hey Lane Kiffin, why don’t you shut up whining to the media for a moment or two and realize your conservative, idiotic coaching was what cost your team the game.

Texas – I know Texas won convincingly this week, so I will go back to the OU game. As they are starting to find a consistent running game, the field should get opened up for Colt McCoy and his BFF Jordan Shipley to start completing more passes downfield. But, Texas has another problem – sloppiness. The Horns are plagued by turnovers and penalties. There are only so many weeks when you can overcome your own mistakes through sheer talent. UF almost lost at home to Arkansas due to turnovers – if the Horns start Plaxico-ing themselves with penalties and turnovers can they overcome them (for example) at a hostile Oklahoma State stadium?

Iowa – While I was cheering on the Hawkeyes and am thrilled that the ‘Autumn of the Shadow’ continues unabated, their performance at Michigan State certainly raised some concerns. I saw the Hawkeyes get inside the 10-yard line on 3 separate occasions. A combination of Pat Buchanan-esque play calling and poor run blocking kept them out of the end zone on 9 of 10 plays. Luckily, they were outside the 5-yard line on that final game winning drive so they were forced to think beyond the “does the back go over the left or right guard?” play-calling that plagued their other two drives earlier in the 4^th quarter.

USC – USC is the most talented team in the country. When they are playing at their best, they are pretty much unbeatable – as they have been for the last several years. Unfortunately, they just don’t play at their best all that often. They seem to believe that opponents cower at the mere sight of the little dude on their helmets, rather than snickering at jokes about Trojans. In the last two weeks, they have squandered at least a 20-point lead in the second half before barely hanging on to win against lesser teams. If Pete Carroll could get his team motivated to play an entire game every week we could be looking a team that is on a John Wooden like run of national titles. Instead every year we have the same conversation: during the season we will wonder which week the Trojans will forget to show up and get shocked by a middle of the pack Pac-10 team and then come Bowl time we will loudly proclaim the Trojans as probably the best team in the country. Much is made of Pete Carroll’s laid-back California style, but no one ever asks if it is too laid-back. A coach instilling some discipline might have actually won more than 1 national title with the talent he has on hand every year.

As for the other contenders (Boise State, TCU, Cincinnati), they all have the same fatal flaw – a disrespected and underachieving conference. I don’t care how good they may appear on the field when you are playing the equivalent of Triple-A each week (or single-A in the case of Boise State’s embarrassing schedule), you don’t get much respect from SEC-brain washed pollsters.

Is it really fair to call a schedule of cream puffs a team’s Achilles heel? I am sure Achilles himself would have preferred a slightly lesser opponent back in the day.

Typically on a fall weekend in Colorado when someone discusses the radical differences between Saturday and Sunday, the topic is the weather. However, the same could be said of the football games played this weekend. On Saturday, almost universally the top teams played poorly against average competition and barely held on for a number of un-inspired wins. On Sunday, the best teams made statements, while the pretenders showed their Achilles heel. Let’s jump right into comments and observations from each day as I am sure I will come back later this week with a special Monday Night Football discussion of tonight’s Broncos/Chargers game. Though, unlike Jon Gruden I may actually say something negative about someone.

The biggest early game of Saturday should come with an asterisk, sort of like A-Rod’s career.  Actually isn’t it interesting that now that A-Rod is off the roids (presumably) he is coming through in October? Maybe all that talk about roids shrinking someone’s balls is true.

Anyway the Texas’s win over OU should come with an asterisk for two reasons. The first is that UT played poorly and really didn’t deserve to win the game. The second is that OU still could have won even with Sam Bradford getting hurt once again early in the game. You know it is a bad game when it could be argued that the healthy winning quarterback of the game did more damage to his Heisman chances than the injured losing quarterback.

The most interesting thing to me is the impact of losing Bradford. If you had asked me before the season, which of the big three teams could best withstand the loss of their quarterback I would have said OU, with all of the talent around Bradford and the history of success with mediocre quarterbacks (insert Jason White joke here). But if you compare OU to UF last weekend in Baton Rouge the difference is stark. Where UF could use an impaired Tebow as a decoy for the entire first half and let other players carry the weight of the game, without Bradford OU looks lost. Especially with an offensive line that blocks only slightly better SPF -8 and wide receivers incapable of getting open against the UT secondary.

With UT failing to impress, Nebraska getting trounced by Texas Tech and KU losing to the embarrassment that is CU football, the real question is whether any Big 12 team deserves to get to the BCS title game? Last year, after a season in which the Big 12 was touted (at least by me) as being as strong as the SEC, their performance was exposed in the bowls. This year from top to bottom they look even more mediocre. Really at this point, can anyone definitively say that the Big 12 is better than the ACC? Virginia Tech beat Nebraska, Miami beat Oklahoma. The only difference between the two if you ask me is that the ACC is deeper and the Big Twelve has a better PR department.

Moving on to the mid-afternoon games, we had UF survive their annual ‘lose a home game to a lesser SEC team’ scare. In fact, no one should have been surprised by Saturday’s game, here is what one leading football writer said in the pre-season:

While it is true that UF’s schedule is only slightly more difficult than SMU’s, everyone should remember that UF has the bad habit of taking off one Saturday each season – unfortunately not during their bye week. The obvious candidate would be at LSU. I would point out that their slip-ups tend to occur in the Swamp but the Gators home schedule is a joke. FSU may be the only legitimate team coming into the Swamp and not even the kids who he circumcised think Tebow is going to lose his final home game to a rival. Really, the only other team coming into the Swamp that could surprise would be Arkansas but I did some research and they are still coached by Bobby Petrino.

Yes, I am once again, quoting myself. What can I say, that guy is really smart. Other than that comment about FSU being a legitimate team of course.

A sidenote before actually discussing the game. Has anyone else noticed  that no UF commercials ever mention whether the school is any good? Whether it was that ridiculous “Go Gator” commercial or the new “When did you become a gator” commercial, they never discuss anything any Gator has ever accomplished other than making the rest of the world hate them for their undeserved feeling of superiority. Unless jean shorts and mullets really do make you better than the rest of us.

In the game itself, how bad was the reffing on the 4^th quarter drive when UF scored a TD to tie it up? There were two such blatantly bad calls on Arkansas that even head Gator cheerleader Gary Danielson (the man who forced me to devise the phrase ‘unzip for easier access’ to describe his analysis of Tebow) was disgusted by it. Apparently the SEC commish is as convinced as the Pollsters that UF is the best team in the country and will do anything he can to get them to the title game.

Unfortunately for Arkansas after settling for field goals (and missed field goal attempts) after too many bad throws in the red zone, there was never a doubt who would win this game after the final missed field goal. Seriously, the Razorbacks should have just headed for the buses and beat the traffic because there was no doubt that Tebow, his girlfriend Riley Cooper (and his blatant but never called offensive pass interference game plan) and the Gators were going to score.

In the pro game on Sunday, for the most part the real contenders showed who they were. The much-hyped Saints/Giants game was over before the second commercial break. When your team relies on strong defense and a running game and neither show up, it is going to be a long day. I haven’t seen wide receivers run that wide open since the last FSU game.

Up in Foxborough, the Titans appeared to give up the moment the first snow flake hit the ground. I know they were good last year, but that team is done. Jeff Fisher is a great coach but sort of like the Broncos of last year, the organization needs a good shaking up.

Really, there were only two really good games all day – and no Jets/Buffalo fans that ugly display was not one of them.

First in Minnesota, we had the highly strategic game plan I like to call Brett Favre and the hail mary offense. Once again we will hear endlessly about Favre, without noting he basically blindly chucked a ball 40 yards downfield and his receiver made a great play to catch it.

The more interesting part was what occurred after that catch. Brad Childress ran the ball three times to burn some clock and position the team for a field goal. A good plan with 30 seconds remaining. Not so good when you are lining up for the field goal (to only take a 2 point lead no less) at the two minute warning. Sure enough, after the made field goal the Ravens marched right down the field and had their own game winning field goal attempt. Only a horribly shank on that kick will keep Childress from being ridiculed for his horrendous game strategy.

Humorously, this all demonstrated how sometimes fans are smarter than coaches or their more conservative brethren in the announcing booth. Dan Dierdorf couldn’t understand at all why the Vikings fans were booing the runs up the middle. He laughed about the runs being good strategy to burn an extra few seconds that an incomplete pass would save. True Dan. If you choose to ignore that those precious seconds left over two minutes and only gave the Vikings a lead that wouldn’t hold up to a made field goal. The fans were right, you have to keep going for a touchdown or at least a first down to burn more clock. Childress is trying to keep his job by coaching like he wears a skirt. What is your excuse Dan?

Also, did you catch Favre’s reaction after the missed Raven field goal? He had to ask Tavares Jackson whether they made it. Boy, that is leadership! A quarterback who doesn’t even care enough about whether the team wins or loses to try and watch a potential game-losing field goal.

Between, Favre’s interest in only furthering his legend and Childress’s incompetence I am very excited for the Vikings to be the high-seed who gets beaten at home by a wild-card team this year.

Our nightcap featured two under the radar one-loss teams in the Bears and Falcons. I could take this time to gloat over Jay Cutler’s second failure in a nationally televised game (6 interceptions and 2 losses on Sunday nights this year) but I will not.

Instead I will note that every Bronco fan in the country was 98% sure Cutler would throw a pick on that final drive. So, from that perspective his game ending incomplete pass into quadruple coverage actually may have been a sign of maturity. Good sign Bears fans!

In a completely unrelated note through five games, Kyle Orton has thrown one interception– a meaningless pick on a hail mary at the end of the first half against the Patriots.

Actually, a real time update on Orton’s stats. 6 weeks, 1 interception, 6 wins.  I still need a couple days to process yet another shocking Bronco win, so we will pick up here next time.

Despite the optimism that always accompanies the beginning of a new NFL season, when I look at all of the news coming out of the league I am left a little down. It seems like that until the real season starts, the overriding stories in the NFL are about greed and ego run amok. Look at the big stories in the NFL today:

Brett Favre’s ‘me-first, I am more important than the rest of my team’ approach to playing seems to have already alienated some of his Viking teammates. In record time for him – at least he is getting better at one aspect of his game with age.

Brandon Marshall was suspended by the Broncos due to having the maturity and intelligence of a 12-year old. If there is one way to increase your value and get a team to meet your salary demands it is to quit on your team and be disruptive. Especially coming off yet another legal problem and hip surgery. Employers love that.

Among the rookies, we still have two holdouts. Michael Crabtree is depriving us of probably the most exciting rookie in the league in some mis-guided attempt to squeeze an extra couple million out of his contract. I love the threat of sitting out a season. Brilliant logic. So he does sit out a season, losing an entire year’s salary and re-enters the draft next year – then what? He has already shown he is difficult to work with, so he gets drafted even lower than tenth and is offered an even lower contract. The offers keep getting lower and he keeps missing prime years of his career. That is a great career move. He must have the same business advisor as Brandon Marshall. Crabtree should ask Aaron Crow how this strategy has worked for him.

The other hold out is Andre Smith who is not nearly as interesting but his impact could be more far-reaching. There are no winners from him holding out the finest man-breasts this side of Phil Mickelson from Hard Knocks.

With all of this negativity (who would have thought Michael Vick would be the lone feel good story so far this season), I woke up a little down this morning.

But then the clouds parted and a beam of light shown upon my TV. While I waited for the epic Arsenal – Manchester United match-up (yes, I am a Gunner fan, deal with it). I watched ESPN’s College GameDay preview special. The combination of an important (if early) soccer game and the realization we sit 5 days from college football, helped to brighten my mood.

So, with the predictions of Kirk, Lou and Robert Smith fresh in my mind, I present my annual college football predictions:

-  The thing that makes me most excited about the season? It is the consensus of all the experts picking a Texas/Florida national title game. You would probably assume that the prospect of two of my least favorite teams playing for the title, would send me spiraling into a Leaving Las Vegas-level funk but it is actually the opposite. You see, every season proves the experts have no idea what they are talking about in the preseason. So, the more convinced they are that something will occur, the more likely it will not. Their picking a UF/UT BCS title game makes it all but certain it won’t happen.

-  So, what will keep the two teams from making it? Well, on the UT side, it could be argued they will lose to Oklahoma. Not so fast. They have a better defense and a better offensive line. If OU didn’t win last year they won’t this year (sorry, Turner). However, what seems to get lost is that UT barely beat Oklahoma State last year – in Austin. OSU is going to be very good and they are going to be gunning for UT when the Horns come to Stillwater. I can see the Big Twelve south having the same Ro-sham-bo problem they did a year ago, with 3 teams with a single loss. Unfortunately after a less-than-impressive bowl season, they won’t get the benefit of the doubt like they did a year ago.

-  As for UF, everyone is sure they will breeze through their schedule on the way to the BCS title game. While it is true that UF’s schedule is only slightly more difficult than SMU’s, everyone should remember that UF has the bad habit of taking off one Saturday each season – unfortunately not during their bye week. The obvious candidate would be at LSU. I would point out that their slip-ups tend to occur in the Swamp but the Gators home schedule is a joke. FSU may be the only legitimate team coming into the Swamp and not even the kids who he circumcised think Tebow is going to lose his final home game to a rival. Really, the only other team coming into the Swamp that could surprise would be Arkansas but I did some research and they are still coached by Bobby Petrino. At least right now, he might have jumped ship by the time you read this.

-  One thing I will guarantee about UF is that Gary Danielson will spend 3 quarters of every UF game he announces trying to make the argument why Tebow will succeed in the NFL. At least it will be a new twist on Danielson’s traditional attempt to make every game a nearly unwatchable 3-hour commercial for Tebow for Heisman.  

-  As would be expected by a guy with the objectivity of Sean Hannity, Lou Holtz believes Notre Dame will play in the National title game. This year. Should I give you a minute to stop laughing before continuing? Yes, Lou’s blind love of all things Irish, is pretty humorous, given that Notre Dame hasn’t been relevant to the national title conversation for over 15 years but I actually agree with him to a point.

-  It’s not that I believe Notre Dame is one of the 2 or 3 best teams in the country but they have a ridiculously easy schedule and as we all know with blind partisans like Lou and Beano Cook still helping to drive the college football conversation they will be greatly overrated. They could be 5-0 taking on USC in October. They could go into November at 7-1. If you don’t think a 7-1 Notre Dame is in the top ten, then you think way too highly of the college football writers and coaches. The Irish won’t play for the National title but I think we can all look forward to them getting absolutely annihilated by a superior team in a BCS bowl this season. Now that is a holiday tradition I missed the last couple years.

-  Speaking of USC, I think they fall short of the title game as well. Losing both coordinators, starting a true freshman at quarterback and losing most of their defense may be too much to overcome. Factor in their inevitable Pac-Ten loss to a lesser team as well as going into Columbus the second week of the season and I don’t see a 2-loss USC team making the BCS title game.

-  Yes, I know I always assume Big Ten loses to more athletic teams but I put an asterisk next to this one. A true freshman QB going into the Horseshoe? Yeah, good luck with that. For the first time in memory, I like the Big Ten quarterback more than the competition.

-  So, if OSU can get by USC, is there any team that can beat them? They have to go to Penn State, but the Lions lost much of their already anemic offense. Can they find enough points to beat a more mature Terrell Pryor? Probably not.

-  Yep, I am picking yet another OSU appearance in a national title game. But at least you have a few months to prepare yourself…you know, to make other plans for the night of the BCS title game.

-  So then who do they play? Well, there are two things you can bank on in any college season. First, Notre Dame be vastly overrated should they show just a little life and Second, when a team is widely believed to be the best team in the country, voters will find a way to get them into the national title game despite all evidence to the contrary.

-  At this point, I would guess much like last year, we will end up with a log-jam of one-loss teams behind an undefeated OSU team. If that is the case, is there any chance the voters keep UF out? They could lose 43-3 to Florida International while OU loses only one game to Texas 43-41 on a hail mary and UF will play in the national title game.

-  Voters want to prove their own intelligence. If they vote someone pre-season number one, they are going to do anything they can to prove themselves right at the end of the season, just so they can point to their own brilliance later (I told you UF was the best team and now they are in the title game), ignoring that they are the reason they are in the title game.

-  So, we face the prospect of a UF/OSU title game. We have seen this before and it wasn’t pretty. Any reason to believe this would be different? No. UF wins another title and unfortunately things turn dark when Gary Danielson, distraught over no longer announcing Tebow games actually kidnaps him and keeps him chained up in his basement until the SWAT team stages an epic assault operation to free him.

Now that I see it on paper, the whole college football season doesn’t make me feel any more optimistic than I did coming in.

Oh, and my boys from Arsenal lost 2-1 on an own-goal.

Dark days indeed.