The invite arrives in the mail and you can’t decide if you really want to attend. You tend to find these parties a little dull and full of people you either don’t particularly like or don’t know.

But you have two buddies that have agreed to attend and they talk you into joining them.

One of your pals, ‘Hawk’ doesn’t get out of the house much these days and is always thankful for any invite.

Your other buddy ‘Soo’ is more of a globetrotter; always hanging with the cool people at the coolest parties. You were even surprised he agreed to come to this party; you assumed he had better options available.

Arriving at the party it initially seems like most other parties: a big crowd right inside the door, noisy, mediocre food and drink options. After making it through the scrum at the entrance, you, Hawk and Soo head to the main room.

As soon as you make it in the main room, both Hawk and Soo notice a really cute girl in the corner. Nice smile, great body, seems friendly and approachable – she is a real trophy.

She also notices both of them and gives them a little smile. Hawk is definitely more interested in her than Soo, who appears as indifferent as a blackjack dealer at an Indian casino and seems to wish he were somewhere else. Maybe New Orleans, South Beach or L.A.

Around 8 or 9 pm, the party really gets going, Hawk starts talking to the trophy and she smiles and chats, but keeps looking over his shoulder at Soo. Soo still seems a little disinterested in the party as a whole, but he isn’t one to turn down a trophy like that and gives her a smile and wink back which makes her blush. It seems pretty obvious early that despite his lack of interest, the trophy has eyes for Soo.

The clock begins creeping closer to midnight and a strange thing occurs. The combination of Soo’s indifference and Hawk’s attention has started to have an impact on the trophy. Rather than fighting for the guy who seems to be almost insulted to be here with this group of people, she has really engaged with Hawk and they appear to really be getting along. They are beginning to look like they have known each other for ages. It really seems like there might be something serious brewing between them.

Distracted by all of the revelry – strange hook-ups, embarrassing drunken failures, people passing out right on top of you, you lose track of Hawk, Soo and the trophy.

As the countdown to twelve changes from minutes to seconds, you find Soo and the trophy cuddling in the corner while Hawk glares at them from across the room. How and when Soo swept in and took the trophy back you aren’t really sure – it is all a blur after hours of drinks – but it seems pretty apparent that after most of an evening acting resigned to a fate he didn’t want, he decided that he could at least get something out of it. Namely her.

As the clock strikes midnight, Soo and the trophy lock in a kiss that is slightly inappropriate for the public setting.

Hawk is out the door, heading home, before the first note of Auld Lang Syne is struck.

Today I feel like Ann Bowden.

To clarify, I have not become a Septuagenarian mother of several mediocre college football coaches overnight, though I am fighting a head cold so I can at least, sort of, relate.

For several years, Ann would forced to watch her husband Bobby’s FSU team take on son Tommy’s Clemson team in the ‘Bowden Bowl’. To show the inner-conflict that tore at her stomach like a large bowl of boiled peanuts, Ann would often wear a sweatshirt that was half Seminole-Garnet and half Clemson-Orange.

That is the Ann I can relate to.

Friday, I will be in Tempe with occasional THH cohorts Turner and Shadow to attend the Insight Bowl and watch their favorite schools against each other: Turner’s Oklahoma Sooners against Shadow’s Iowa Hawkeyes.

But as the man in the middle for which team should I cheer?

I asked Turner and Shadow to provide me some level of guidance like we had done for Shadow prior to the recent FSU/OU match-ups but as they are just beginning on a 14-hour odyssey across the desert southwest with 5 kids in a van (I’m flying – I ain’t no dummy), they didn’t get around to it, so it looks like it is all on me.

But it is Bowl season, so with a month to prepare I think I can come up with my own decision criteria.

Hometown: Iowa City vs. Norman

I have never been to Iowa City but hold an inherent grudge against any city that just steals the name of the state in which it is located. Without doing research, I assume Norman is named after the character from Cheers and I am always a fan of going where everyone knows your name.

OU: 1, Iowa: 0

Film Role: Hiding Out vs. Twister

Iowa was the dream college of high school student Annabeth Gish as she was pursued by stock broker on the run, Jon Cryer in Hiding Out. This really begs the question: which is more unbelievable about the 1980’s; that (1) Jon Cryer was hired to play a leading man or (2) it was perfectly acceptable (and totally not creepy) for a guy in his mid-20’s to fall in love with a high school girl.

On the other hand, OU’s football stadium had an un-credited role in the twister movie Twister. It is impossible to list all of the ridiculous things about the movie Twister so let us just point out that in Twister, Bill Paxton is like the most desirable man in the entire stateof Oklahoma and he is a weatherman.

Sure, Hiding Out if re-made today would be very, very different (look for the cameo by Chris Hansen at the 1:18 mark!) but it is still less ridiculous than Twister. I mean, seriously Bill Paxton??

OU: 1, Iowa: 1

Mascot: Herky the Hawk  vs. the Sooner Schooner

Herky is the plastic headed bird mascot that roams the Iowa sidelines. The Sooner Schooner is the horse-drawn covered wagon that rides out on to the field to celebrate Sooner touchdowns.

While I believe it is a strategic advantage to have a plastic head in case Herky ever gets in a fist-fight with Bucky the Badger or Sparty, I will go with the Schooner here. Essentially, the best I can tell the entire Hawkeye franchise was invented in the middle of the 20^th century for little rational reason. The Schooner goes back to the historical precedent of the settlers who rode their covered wagons to claim land in Oklahoma after poisoning the local native Americans with blankets covered in Smallpox.

Sure, that is not a period of American history that should be celebrated but at least there is some level of historical accuracy. Besides, if OU didn’t use the Schooner they would probably have a mascot made up of Red Solo cups.

OU: 2, Iowa: 1

Former Coach: Hayden Fry vs. Barry Switzer

Both of these schools had legendary coaches that led them to conference and national championships. Fry spent most of his career at Iowa overshadowed by more famous peers like Bo Schembechler or Earle Bruce. Switzer, on the other hand, led a perennial national power Oklahoma squad with equal parts swagger, athletic ability, booster cash and the world’s most enjoyable triple-option offensive attack. Sure, it was the dirtiest program west of Dade County (or at least west of Tuscaloosa) but they were fun to watch.

While only one of these coaches produced an autobiography that I read as a middle-schooler, I will go with Fry here. Do I have fond memories of Chuck Long and the Hawkeyes from my youth? No, honestly I don’t. But I do often get Fry confused with Hayden Fox from the TV show Coach and I have many fond memories of that show.

OU: 2, Iowa: 2

Tie Breaker: WWMMD?

It comes down to one final question: what would Megan Menzel do? Megan, who has recently taken over the Iowa women’s golf program, happens to be married one of my best friends. And she grew up in Oklahoma – hosting her wedding reception in OU’s football stadium (you probably don’t need to know all of this, but there it is). Who better to help decide which team to cheer on here than someone with experience with each program?

A quick text to Mr. Menzel and I received the following answer:

Iowa all the way. She hates OU.

So there you go. If a woman who enabled me to do the Heisman pose in front of Steve Owen’s Heisman trophy while wearing a tuxedo is against the Sooners, than so am I.

OU: 2, Iowa: 3

Fight! Fight! Fight! For IOWA!

Later, walking back to the hotel, past the cars overflowing with people, coolers, and camp chairs, the breeze would kick up and make the air feel almost chilly. Part of that was the surprising cool night air just beginning to signal to north Florida that autumn is on its way; part of it was the breeze hitting the accumulated sweat and dirt covering every inch of our bodies.

But earlier, in the moment that I will always carry with me, there was no movement of air, except the breath of 80,000 people leaving their mouths in accompaniment to their full throated yells and screams.

It was early in the 4^th quarter. Oklahoma still led by a touchdown but FSU had the momentum after the defense had spent the last quarter and a half stymieing the high-powered Oklahoma offense and a 69-yard punt had pinned the OU offense inside their own five yard line. The air hung warm and humid and dripped with a feeling of anticipation and expectation. 80,000 FSU fans didn’t want FSU to tie the game. They knew FSU would tie the game. The players just needed a little help.

As the Sooners lined up to snap the ball from their own two-yard line, less than 50 feet away stood 20,000 FSU students doing everything possible to disrupt and distract the Sooners short of lining up the tan, in-shape co-eds and having them flash Landry Jones as if they were on Bourbon Street.

Turner and I, about 40 rows up from the 5-yard line, were close enough that I could convince myself that cheering and frantically waving my arms to implore other Nole fans to scream as loud as I was would have an impact. But we were also far enough away to be able to take in the entire scene.

Thousands of students blurring together into a screaming, jumping, arm-waving, garnet colored sea.

Seminole defenders jumping up and down, feeding on the energy of their fellow students like some sci-fi monster absorbing the very life-force of fellow humans; dancing to some rhythm that only they could discern from the cacophony of cheers pouring over them like a waterfall.

Across the line of scrimmage, Landry Jones trying to put together 2 thoughts and then communicate to his teammates underneath an avalanche of noise.

Doing everything short of throwing out a white towel and punting on 2^nd down just to make the noise end, the Sooners gained only a few yards before going 3 and out. But just because the offense left the field didn’t mean the noise would drop.

As the punt team lined up, the noise just escalated. 2 straight OU false starts moved the punt team right back to the 2 yard line they had just escape and re-enforced to the crowd that they weren’t just watching a football game – they were participating in and affecting it. The punt return team felt it as well. At mid-field Greg Reid danced and bopped. Linebackers and linemen waved their arms to ask foreven more noise.

With only 9 yards separating him from the Seminoles, maybe 50 feet separating him from a sea of blood-thirsty students and one of the most dangerous returners in the country waiting to make a ‘Deion’ play at mid-field, Tress Way, the Sooner punter, predictably shanked the ball straight to his left like me standing at a golf tee. The Seminole offense would get the ball back inside the OU 40-yard line.

In that moment, we not only knew that FSU would tie the game but we knew that at least in some way we were responsible.

And with that moment, Florida State football’s pre-eminence was awakened from a decade-long hibernation.

Obviously, the Florida State/Oklahoma game didn’t turn out how I was hoping. The Noles did score on an improbable 3^rd and 28 completion flung by a freshman back-up quarterback to a freshman receiver who ran into the endzone after catching a pass badly mis-played by 2 Sooner defenders. Unfortunately, this woke up the Sooner offense who responded with a touchdown drive of their own followed by a tipped pass interception and a field goal that clinched the game for Oklahoma.

FSU was ultimately done in by too many turnovers, penalties and an efficient Oklahoma machine just beginning to reach its potential. With no running game and a young, inexperienced quarterback forced to play by injury, FSU’s offense only had so many bullets in its holster when the game was on the line. To put this in language even a Sooner can understand, FSU looked liked the greenhorns that they are while OU has been to this rodeo before.

To be so close but to fall short obviously hurts. How the rest of the season plays out for the Noles will be determined by how they respond on the road at Clemson this coming week. Show up mad and ready to take out your aggression on a Clemson team freshly cocky from beating an overrated Auburn team and FSU is on the fast track to the national elite. Arrive in Death Valley, sulking from missed opportunities, disinterested and overwhelmed by an athletic Clemson team and another 3 or 4 loss campaign will be the result.

But what happens the rest of this season is almost a side issue right now. With a team loaded with really good young players, a pipeline of perpetual top recruiting classes and a stable quality coaching staff, it seems to be a matter of time until FSU returns to the top of the college football landscape.

Even Turner, perennial cynic and eternal pessimist, said he was glad that OU ended their home and home series with FSU this year. He doesn’t want to see what this team becomes as they mature.

But beyond the team on the field, this game was important for the people in the stands.

An entire generation of FSU students has swum in the Westcott fountain on graduation day without experiencing the pinnacle of college football in Tallahassee. I was fortunate to come in with a national championship team my freshman year in 1993, and witness #2 FSU defeat #1 UF in the regular season finale of 1996 – my final home game as an undergrad (all records of the Bowl game that followed that winter have been wiped from my memory Men-In-Black style).

My generation expected a great team and top-five match-ups every single year. These kids have not. ‘Big games’ have been defined recently as random ACC match-ups against the likes of Boston College or Virginia Tech that seemed to be used primarily as a vehicle for selling new t-shirts.

For the first time, FSU students got a sense of how it feels to cheer on a great college football team. They got a sense for what an important game feels like; from having to shake off a hangover to go yell inappropriate comments toward Erin Andrews at College GameDay in the morning, to pacing your drinking over the next 6 hours in preparation for a game that becomes the lead story on SportsCenter for the next two days.

What they may not know yet but will realize soon is that it is addictive. Seeing highlights of your team coming up short in the biggest game of the week may be a little painful for a day or two but it is much more enjoyable than never even being discussed at all.

Once you have a moment like we did collectively when OU’s punt went sailing out of bounds at the 38 yard line, you will crave it as strongly as a drug.

 The players will realize it as well. They may know what it means to excel as individuals and dominate inferior opponents, but now they know what it feels like to be the most dominant force in all of college football.

Even if for just a moment.

A year ago in preparation for the FSU/OU game in Norman, Turner and I each lobbied Shadow to cheer on our team. We came up with categories and made our best arguments as to why our school was better than the other. In the end, Shadow chose to cheer on Oklahoma and I have cried myself to sleep in a fetal position every night since.

This year, having already stated our cases we left it to Shadow as to how he would cheer.

Below is the transcript of his deciding press conference, taped live at the Aurora, Colorado Boys and Girls Club.

If you missed ESPN’s televised special on the Shadow’s decision, here is the transcript of Lee Corso’s conversation with him:

Thank you very much. Everybody is on pins and needles across the country, particularly SuperDave and Turner.

Are you ready to go Shadow? Where is the powdered doughnut?

Left it at home.

What’s new? What’s been going on with you this summer?

Man, this whole choosing sides experience, looking forward to it.

What have you thought about this process?

This process has been everything I’ve thought and more.   I put myself in a position to have this process where I can hear SuperDave’s and Turner’s pitches and figure out what was the best possible chance for me to ultimately win and to ultimately be happy.

How many people know your decision right now?

Not many. It’s a very, very small number. And I probably could count them on my fingers.

One hand or two hands?

Let’s say one.

When did you decide?

I think I decided this morning. I mean, I decided this morning I went day to day. I wake up one morning, it’s this team. I wake up another morning, it’s this team.

But this morning I woke up, had a great conversation with my mom. Once I had that conversation with her, I think I was set.

So the last time you changed your mind was yesterday?

The last time I changed my mind was probably in my dreams. And when I woke up this morning I knew it was the right decision.

Who in this process, Shadow, have you taken advice from and who has had the biggest influence?

I’ve taken a lot of advice from my friends and family. A lot of people that I look towards in a time of need or for advice, and ultimately they looked at me and said you ultimately have to live with your decision that you’re going to make, and you have to do what’s best for you, for your family and for you to ultimately be happy.

What was the major factor, the major reason in your decision?

I think the major factor and the major reason in my decision was the best opportunity for me to make such a tough decision and still stay friends with both Turner and SuperDave.

Do you have any doubts about your decision?

No. I don’t have any doubts at all.

You’ve had everybody else biting their nails. So I guess it’s time for them to stop chewing. The answer to the question everybody wants to know: Shadow, what’s your decision?

This Saturday, this is very tough, this Saturday, I’m going to take my remote to ABC to root for the Florida State Seminoles

The Seminoles? That was the conclusion you woke up with this morning?

That was the conclusion I woke up with this morning.

Why?

Well, much like Star Wars, I think there needs to be a balance in the Force.  Last year, I rooted for the Sooners, and they dominated.  This year, I decided I needed to maintain balance in the THH and in my friendship with SuperDave and Turner, and root for the Seminoles.  Also, I think OU having a bye in Week 2 was incredibly stupid and they will be rusty….and I like to root for the eventual winner in any game.

How do you explain this to the people in Oklahoma?

I mean, it’s heartfelt for me. You know, it’s hard to explain, but at the same time my heart, with me giving them my pick last year, to that team, it was everything.

I mean, those 20 plus fans that come out and read SuperDave’s blog every week, and they have seen me grow from an 37 year old man to a 39 year old man.  I felt like the greatest challenge for me is to flip flop this year.

What do you think Turner’s reaction will be?

I’m not sure.  But it will probably involve the yelling of BAPC.  Maybe another letter will even get added.  FBAPC?

Ever want to go through this again?

This is tough. This is very tough, because you feel like you’ve let a lot of people down. You’ve raised a lot of people’s expectations also. But it was a tough decision, because I know how loyal I am.

I wouldn’t want to do it again.

Thank you very much, Shadow, for coming on the program and sharing this momentous decision with us.  There you have it.  Saturday night.  2/3 of the THH in the stands at Bobby Bowden Field at Doak Campbell Stadium…and the Shadow will be watching from his couch, cheering on EJ Manual and the rest of the Seminoles.

I and every other member of Seminole nation have spent the last 372 days looking forward to this weekend, and not because we are huge Sarah Jessica Parker fans. After the Sooners slipped the Seminoles a big box of small-pox infested blankets as part of a 47-17 thumping last year in Norman, for FSU fans, Revenge isn’t just a new crappy TV show that your wife will make you watch – it is an obsession.

FSU desperately wants to win this game. Not just for the payback factor (though that would certainly be enough), but to also send a signal to the college football world that FSU is back in the discussion for a national championship, no matter which conference they are in.

But the realist in me has to ask if one year has been enough time to close the gap demonstrated by last year’s 34-7 halftime lead for the Sooners.

Before, Turner and I jump on a plane tomorrow and spend about 10 hours working our way from Denver to Tallahassee, let’s take a look at the key match-ups within the game that will decide whether Turner or I will wake up on Sunday morning and, despite our epic hangover, smile with the knowledge that our team is one giant leap closer to the BCS title game.

Stoops vs Stoops

Last year, OU’s no-huddle hurry up offense seemed to catch the Seminole defense off guard. In the heat of Norman, the Seminole defense wilted faster than the dignity of a Bachelor Pad contestant. If Mark Stoops hasn’t come up with a way for the Seminole defense to slow down big brother Bob’s OU offense, there is little chance of a Nole victory. Specifically, Mark Stoops needs to focus on finding an answer for…

FSU defensive line vs Landry Jones

The only thing that has lasted longer than the time Landry Jones had in the pocket against the Noles last year is his virginity. With no pressure, Jones picked apart the Nole defense. With the athletes the Sooners bring with them and a rhythm passing game, if the Noles can’t disrupt Jones’ timing by trying to knock the moustache off of him, he will walk up and down the field again. Specifically, if there is no pressure on Jones from the defensive line then the onus falls on the secondary to shut down the OU receivers with one of those match-ups jumping out…

Greg Reid vs Ryan Broyles

Greg Reid is the ridiculously talented, loud talking cornerback that sees himself as the heir apparent to Deion Sanders and Terrell Buckley. Unfortunately, early last year he covered more like Colonel Sanders and tackled like Pearl S. Buck (seriously – at one point during the Miami game I tweeted that my 5’1”, 70 year old mother could have made a better tackle attempt than Reid on a UM touchdown). But as the season progressed, so did Reid’s game, culminating in devastating hits on a VT receiver in the ACC title game and a game-ending hit on Marcus Lattimore in the Chick-Fil-a Bowl. Has he progressed to the point where he can contain the most prolific receiver in college football? We know Broyles will get his fair share of catches, but can Reid keep that number low and more importantly make sure they are all short passes with few yards after catch? He better contain Broyles, especially if the offense isn’t moving the ball. If they aren’t moving, there will be one big reason why….

FSU running game vs OU defensive line

FSU scored on its first drive of the game last year by connecting on a series of short and mid-range passes. Once OU realized they wouldn’t go deep because of the pressure on Christian Ponder, the defense moved up, the mid-range passing levels closed and the Noles were as dead as the Big 12 conference is today. Unlike the pass-happy teams of the past, FSU under Jimbo Fischer needs a balanced attack (see: Miami game last year). A running game slows the pass rush and keeps the linebackers near the line for an extra second, opening up passing lanes. Of course, if EJ Manuel can’t hit open receivers then it won’t matter. In this game, it may come down to who can control their emotions…

FSU Big Stage Poise vs OU Hostile Environment Poise

Let’s face it. FSU has not been in a lot of high profile games recently. When they have they come up smaller than Verne Troyer in an NBA game. 47-17 at Oklahoma. 44-33 versus Virginia Tech in the ACC title game. Did the bowl victory over media darling South Carolina change that? Is there a core belief that the Noles belong now? Contrast that with an OU team that is used to the big stage but has struggled in hostile environments – losses at Missouri and Texas A&M last year. Can a crowd that finally senses it is their time get to the Sooners? Will 3 hours of the tomahawk chop turn Bob Stoops into a visor-throwing Steve Spurrier replica? More importantly, will Turner survive his trip to Tallahassee or will he fold like Jason White in a BCS game…

Turner’s Drinking Stamina vs Tallahassee Tailgating

I give all the credit in the world to the Sooner fans we met last year. They were gracious hosts dedicated to a great gameday experience – even for out-of-town visitors not wearing burnt orange. But with College Gameday in town and ABC picking this up as the primetime game, there won’t be a 3 hour tailgate like last year. This year it will be an 8-hour tailgate. Turner is a mild-mannered, hard-working, father of 2. He probably has the stamina for drinking that Landry Jones will have in the bedroom on his wedding night. Can he survive 8 hours of drinking in the Florida heat before the game? If we have to leave a passed-out Turner at the tailgate when we go to the game, does that say more about him or us?

The answers to all of these questions will decide the biggest game of the college football year and the biggest game in my fan life since January 2001.

I don’t know the answers, but I can’t wait to find them out.

Coming into the 2011 college football season, it doesn’t feels like we are facing the dawn of a new season. Rather, it feels like we are emerging from our debris covered shelters into a post-apocalyptic world.

After an off-season filled with controversy; teams being busted breaking every rule in the book and schools flirting with new conferences like a divorcee out at Applebee’s on a Thursday night, the college football world isn’t the same one we left last January. Where buildings with flashy neon signs that said THE Ohio State University and THE U once stood, are now piles of rubble.

But like the obligatory rose growing from the rubble that is a less then subtle metaphor for hope in apocalypse films, college football too has moments that remind us why we love college football so much.

They are called Saturdays.

So with Saturdays about to kick off, it is time to make my bold and almost guaranteed to be entirely wrong, season predictions. And this year, just like ESPN scripted it, the college football success comes down to one thing.

It is all about the quarterbacks.

For me to even consider a team as a national title contender, a team needs to have a proven quarterback.

Last year, Florida and Texas started the season as top five teams. Coming off BCS bowl appearances, a number of starters returning and rosters filled with highly recruited kids coming out high school, it was just assumed they could pick up right where they had left off the year before when they combined for 2 losses.

Instead they combined for 12 losses.

What was the difference? New quarterbacks.

It was just assumed that with the coaches and talent around them, John Brantley and Garrett Gilbert could pick up where Tim Tebow and Colt McCoy had left off.

But a fancy pedigree doesn’t guarantee success. UF and UT last year aren’t the only examples of course. Matt Leinart took USC to 2 straight national title games. His followers, John David Booty, Mark Sanchez and Matt Barkley have never even sniffed a BCS title game.

Applying this lesson automatically eliminates several traditional national title contenders.

Sorry Alabama, time to go poison another tree in defeat.

Tough luck Ohio State, your tattoos this year will need frowny-faces.

Too bad Virginia Tech, another BCS bowl and we would have tried to learn what a Hokie is.

Arkansas, it was fun. Call us when Bobby Petrino abandons you mid-season or Jerry Jones buys you a championship.

With this logic, I envisioned LSU making the national championship game, given the NCAA’s new by-law that states a National title game must always involve a SEC team, but now that Jordan Jefferson tapped his inner-Garo Yapremian during a bar brawl a couple weeks ago, there are just too many open questions.

So which teams are left that fit the mold?

Oklahoma has Landry Jones, his moustache and virginity back but also a (hopefully – crossing fingers – knocking wood) tough game in Tallahassee in a couple weeks and then what appears to be a weakened Big Twelve to navigate.

Oregon should have clear sailing to the BCS title game, if they can get by LSU this weekend and Stanford later in the season. A huge if. Nothing is scarier than a Christmas tree mascot and 50,000 IT nerds spending halftime day-dreaming of becoming the next Mark Zuckerberg.

Stanford has to get by Oregon. Which is infinitely harder given the number of uniforms Oregon wears. They always say visualization is a key game preparation. How is someone supposed to visualize beating the Ducks, when they don’t know what they will look like? Are you at a distinct disadvantage if you envisioned the Ducks in white and they come out in neon green? I say yes. Andrew Luck will just have to console himself with the Heisman Trophy they are already engraving for him.

Boise State would seem poised to be in the perfect spot to finally crack the BCS title game crystal ceiling. Kellen Moore returns; they have one last year of the junior varsity schedule of the WAC. Their toughest game is against perennially overrated Georgia on opening weekend. Unfortunately for BSU, there is about 0% chance that pollsters and athletic directors will allow them to steal the money from a less-deserving BCS conference team.

Florida State has a sort of returning QB in EJ Manual, who has the physical tools to be the next Cam Newton (with fewer felonies). But after getting so badly out-coached by Bob Stoops last season, will the Noles prepare for last year’s OU game plan only to be surprised by another new wrinkle? If so, will I momentarily contemplate stabbing Josh Heupel in the kidneys for being single-handedly responsible for several of my worst moments as a FSU fan? The answer to one of these questions is yes.

The Noles also have to go Gainesville, and if Charlie Weis and Will Muschamp haven’t come to blows by then, it will be a tough game. The Noles will also have to navigate their inevitable road ACC game no-show (prime candidates: at Clemson the week after OU and the Thursday night game at Boston College). While every game is winnable, the Noles have beaten the optimist out of me over the last decade, so I will assume they come up short at least once or twice.

Oregon and Oklahoma may both lose once, but pollsters have proven over and over again, that if you are ranked at the top of the polls at the beginning of the season you are given every opportunity to stay there.

Having seen Bob Stoops coach BCS games, I can’t in good conscience pick an OU title (sorry, Turner), so it says here that the Oregon Ducks will win the national title, and Phil Knight will immediately commission 11 different versions of the national title trophy – with each trotted out before a different game next season.

Let’s just hope it doesn’t come down to a ref botching an onside kick call this time.