I am back today with my best suggestions as to who each NFC team should draft – whether they want to or not.

NFC East

Dallas Cowboys – Sitting in his War Room on Thursday, I imagine Jerry Jones will command his team to ‘go draft the best’. Afraid of their owner’s wrath, the Cowboys draft Jahvid Best despite a multitude of running backs on the roster. On the bright side, coming from northern California, Best should be able to help Jones expand his wine appreciation to some less popular labels.

New York Giants – After last season’s epic collapse of the Giants running game, there is a need to find some new blood for the Giants backfield. Dexter McCluster, the hybrid running back/receiver out of Ole Miss would finally give the Giants a playmaking threat. And it gives Eli Manning someone to reminisce with about all those crazy nights at the Ole Miss Alpha Delta Pi house out of earshot from the old ball and chain. Man, those AD Pi’s are WILD.  

Philadelphia Eagles – In the last year, the Eagles have jettisoned long time Safety Brian Dawkins, running back Brian Westbrook and quarterback Donovan McNabb. In steps Kevin Kolb at quarterback and LeSean McCoy at running back. Now, the Eagles can draft Eric Berry at Safety. There is no chance that Eagles fans could come up with bad names to call him with a last name like Berry. On the bright side, if that doesn’t motivate him to play well nothing will.

Washington Redskins – The Redskins just traded for a veteran QB that is occasionally shaky and prone to errors in big spots. If Shanahan’s handling of Jake Plummer in Denver is any indication, expect the Skins to draft a talented and arrogant quarterback with little history of winning in college. Coincidentally, that exact phrase is written on Jimmy Clausen’s business cards.

NFC North

Minnesota Vikings – Of course this time of year, there is one big question in Minnesota. Everyone needs to know when the team’s most important player will return. I for one am not worried about it. Joe Nathan’s replacement has done fine in the closer role for the Twins so far. As for that other guy. I would suggest drafting Jevan Snead out of Ole Miss as a potential ‘back-up plan’ but does any Viking fan really have the appetite for dealing with another quarterback out of Mississippi?

Green Bay Packers – In a year after Aaron Rodgers spent most of the snaps running for his life, the Packers need to get some more help on the offensive line. Mike Iupati, the guard out of Idaho is a perfect fit in more ways than one. He is a Samoan from the northwest rather than a redneck from the south, his name has too many vowels at the beginning of it rather than too many consonants at the end. He is the exact opposite of a certain player none too popular around Lambeau these days.

Detroit Lions – After addressing the offense over the last couple of drafts, the Lions need to start shoring up their defense. Gerald McCoy, the defensive tackle out of Oklahoma is a good fit. With a quarterback that couldn’t beat Florida in college and a wide receiver from a mediocre ACC team, it only makes sense to draft a defensive player that couldn’t beat Texas. Now the Lions may achieve their dream of being as good as a second rate college team. Quite a step up over the last few years for the Lions.

Chicago Bears – The Bears should trade up to draft Ndamukong Suh, to help fortify the defensive line with the release of Alex Brown and the inevitable Tommy Harris injury. Plus then Adewale Ogunleye won’t be the toughest pronunciation on the team. Oh wait, the Bears have no picks to trade up since acquiring Jay Cutler? Wow, that trade keeps paying big dividends, huh Bears fans?

NFC South

Tampa Bay Buccaneers – In his first year as head coach, Raheem Morris cleaned house of the veterans that made up one of the better defenses in the league. Now they are one of the worst. I don’t know who the Bucs could draft to improve them but I know one person they won’t draft: Myron Rolle. If Morris’s massive insecurity kept him from keeping Derrick Brooks on the roster, what are the odds he could handle Rhodes Scholar Rolle on his team?

Carolina Panthers – Taylor Mays, USC’s freaky athlete Safety, would be an immediate improvement for the Panthers secondary. And at 6’3”, 230 pounds, he is more than big enough to fend off any practice time attacks by Steve Smith.

Atlanta Falcons – Last year seemed to demonstrate that Michael Turner may have been a one-year wonder in Atlanta. Maybe it is time the Falcons look for another runner for Turner to split carries with. CJ Spiller is the best running back (and maybe athlete) in the draft. Plus coming from Clemson I am sure he is well acquainted with the Georgia Dome turf, home to the Chick Fil-A Peach Bowl where the 3^rd place ACC team annually plays.

New Orleans Saints – They may not need him, but really is there any other team that Tim Tebow should play for? They are named the Saints! During the next hurricane he can hold up the levies by himself.

NFC West

St. Louis Rams – Seeking to re-ignite the offense formerly known as the The Greatest Show on Turf, the Rams will draft Sam Bradford. Bradford is a natural fit after leading Bob Stoops record breaking offense at Oklahoma. As long as the Rams don’t play in a BCS Bowl, I have complete confidence in Sam being able to bring his collegiate success to the pros.

San Francisco Forty-Niners – Always seeking some talent to make their horrid quarterback situation look somewhat mediocre, the Forty-Niners recently traded for Ted Ginn Jr. The perfect player to complement Ginn would be Arrelious Benn out of Illinois. Like Ginn, Benn is an oft-injured, underperforming but speedy and talented wide receiver out of the Big Ten. See? Like they are twins separated at birth.

Seattle Seahawks – Brian Bulaga is the natural fit for the Seahawks. Not only could he potentially step in and address the massive gap left by Walter Jones’ retirement at left tackle but with a last name that sounds like a fish egg appetizer he would fit right at home in a town known best for throwing fish around.

Arizona Cardinals – the Cardinals are still looking for more help on the defensive side of the ball. This offseason they lost linebacker Carlos Dansby and Safety Antrell Rolle but picked up walking mouth Joey Porter and Rex Ryan regurgitation Kerry Rhodes. If the Cardinals draft USC defensive end Everson Griffen not only could he help fortify their defensive line but will also stand in as a hot tub buddy for Matt Leinart, a huge gap on the team currently. That is unless the Cardinals doubt Leinart’s starting ability and trade for Ben Roethlisberger. Big Ben and Leinart on the same team? The ladies of Arizona won’t know what him them. Literally.

In some ways today is very different from the world in 2004.

In 2004, a huge budget science-fiction movie won the Oscar for best picture as well as 10 other Oscars. This year, a similar film lost in practically every category that matters.

In 2004, the last Oldsmobile was manufactured thanks in large part to GM’s inability to compete with the Japanese auto companies. This year, one of those Japanese companies can’t figure out how to keep their cars from running out of control.

In 2004, the Boston Red Sox was everyone’s sentimental favorite, lovable loser baseball team. This year, they are an underperforming, overpaid team with the most obnoxious fan-base in the country.

In 2004, Ronald Reagan died. This year, he was resurrected by Ron Howard and Jim Carrey.

But in one way, 2004 and 2010 are very similar. Jake Delhomme, LaDainian Tomlinson and Terrell Owens are three of the biggest stories in the NFL.

Three former super stars well beyond their playing primes are some of the marquee names still available in the NFL free agency. In 2004, every team would have vied for the services of the best running back, (possibly) the best wide receiver and one of the best quarterbacks in the NFL. Today, all three are greeted with the deafening sound of silence.

Today LT visited the Vikings and may be off to the Jets tomorrow. Delhomme’s name has been mentioned in connection with Cleveland. At the other end of Ohio, T.O. just departed Cincinnati and left such an outstanding impression that the Bengals immediately went out and signed Antonio Bryant whose ceiling as a player is as a less consistent Braylon Edwards.

In case you have forgotten – that isn’t good.  

So, where should each of these veterans end up?

Tomlinson

Current Interested teams: The Vikings and Jets are both looking at LT to replace the departed Chester Taylor and Thomas Jones respectively. Which is sort of like trading in your Hyundai Sonata for a Hummer. Sure the Sonata isn’t flashy or exciting but it is generally dependable. The Hummer was really cool several years ago but is now just a relic that needs constant attention.

If LT was replaced as a third down back by Darren Sproles in San Diego, I am not sure I understand the rationale of moving him into that role in Minnesota or New York. LT’s strength is getting in the end zone: he isn’t explosive anymore and doesn’t make people miss in the open field. Do you know what the strengths of both Adrian Peterson and Shonn Greene are? Getting in the end zone and the tough extra yard. Plus they maintain explosive ability and can make people miss. How does LT help either of these teams?

Where he should go: LT’s weakness is speed and explosiveness and an ability to break the big play. Doesn’t it make sense to pair him with someone that can do that but can’t take the play to play pounding? How about in Philly with LeSean McCoy? LT can take some of the hits absorbed by Brian Westbrook last year.

My personal favorite idea though is to move him to Chicago. Matt Forte is a nice quick running back that can catch the ball but last year demonstrated he isn’t ready to be an every down back. LT can come in and take the short yardage runs that stuffed Forte last year. Plus LT and Jay Cutler can share notes on how big of an a-hole Phillip Rivers is.

Delhomme

Current Interested Teams: Jake has visited Cleveland in the wake of Derek Anderson’s less than magnanimous exit. Derek made Jay Cutler’s whining and moaning exit last year from Denver look almost humble and appreciative. There have also been rumors that the Cardinals have debated bringing in Jake as a competitor or back-up to Matt Leinart, which is ironic given that it was the Cardinals in the playoffs over a year ago that picked off Jake 5 times and turned him into the quarterbacking equivalent of Charles Barkley on the golf course.

While thematically, I can understand why the Cardinals might be interested in Jake (just like Kurt Warner: picking up a formerly successful quarterback that has fallen on hard times in his last couple years), it is in the details that makes this scary. Warner was successful because of his accuracy. Jake’s accuracy is about as good as Rip Torn driving home after a night at the bar.

The idea of Jake trying to complete passes to the receiving corps in Cleveland is also absolutely frightening. If he can’t complete passes to some of the best receivers in the game (Steve Smith, for example) what would he do with the Browns contingent? Not to mention how his fragile mental state would handle boos reigning down from the Dawg Pound. If the Cardinals turned him into Charles Barkley as a golfer, the Browns could send him all the way to becoming Charles Barkley behind the wheel of a car.

Where he should go: Really Jake’s only value now is as a calming presence on the bench for a young QB entrenched as a starter that can in a worst case scenario come in and hand the ball off. How about Detroit? Their back-up last year was Daunte Culpepper. That might be the only position in the league where Jake is a step-up. Even on his worst day.

Owens

Current Interested Teams: With the Bengals signing Bryant and the Ravens nabbing Anquan Boldin and re-signing Derrick Mason there aren’t teams immediately on the horizon with an interest in T.O. Hard to believe that people aren’t beating down the door of a 36-year old, temperamental wide receiver with a history of calling out his quarterback and greatly overestimating his own abilities.

Where he should go: Isn’t it obvious? T.O. needs a coach that is not afraid of players with bad attitudes or players that are past their prime that have been given up for dead by their current teams. T.O. should definitely be the prime candidate for the Bill Romanowski memorial locker in Mike Shanahan’s Redskins locker room. If having a 6^th offensive coordinator doesn’t destroy Jason Campbell’s confidence, T.O. berating him and Shanahan drafting a rookie back-up to back him up should do it.

In 2004, we re-elected George W. Bush.

Could sending T.O. to D.C. today really end up any worse?

We tried a little something different this week. Rather than the typical approach of my reviewing the games this weekend and identifying which we will choose (either using some theme I make up as I go or just based purely on the most random match-ups I can find), I have decided to outsource the selection this week.

After my much maligned selections last week, I decided it was time for Turner and Shadow to ‘put up or shut up’. For the next two weeks, they will take turns deciding which games we will pick, based on whatever criteria or theme they so desire.

I admit it was a little hard for me to give up my power. After receiving Shadow’s games this week, I naturally started second guessing him. Once Turner and I cracked the puzzle wrapped in an enigma shrouded in mystery that was Shadow’s “hint”, I immediately started looking at the other games and seeing what other games could have met the criteria or made up alternative criteria. Not very host-like of me, I admit. I invite Shadow to lead the game for a week and yet I can’t give up control long enough to let him lead for once.

After all of the Favre bashing I have done over the years, it turns out I am just like him. I too am unable to give up the control and just be a member of the team. That is frankly a little disconcerting. I always thought of myself as better than that. I have been on many sports teams in the past, and was always just one of the team (probably to the detriment of my athletic career on occasion, but let’s not open that can of mental worms). I have never thought of myself as above the team – who is this I have become?

However, Brett has done ok for himself, so maybe I should just embrace this new disturbing reality and go load up on Wranglers tomorrow.

Turner: Hello readers, Feliz Navidad, Happy Hanukah, Merry Christmas, Joyous Festivas or just a flat out Happy Holiday Season.  It is a great season to take time on what we are so thankful for.   I’m thankful for (in no particular order except the first one)

• The Shadow (it’s his birthday!!) and Super Dave’s Friendship
• Las Vegas during football season (except the parlays and the Patriots) and March Madness Free Throw Betting
• Introduction to Poker – being able to dominate The Shadow at heads up is so great
• Bill Simmons & Chuck Klosterman (even better together – like Peanut Butter and Jelly)
• Watching Tom Brady miss a wide-open Wes Welker, appearing on Sportcenter (covering my eyes) and watching the Broncos beat the Pats
• Having a Sooner win every college basketball award and live up to their seeding (no football thankfulness included)
• Lakers / Nuggets Western Conference Finals (regardless of the outcome)
• Iowa Hawkeyes BCS Bowl Berth (R.I.P. Sooner and Noles)
• THE MIGHTY SMU MUSTANGS GOING TO A BOWL!! 
• This Blog which you will learn over time is historically significant
• Manute Bol

This list will continue to expand but like usual, I’m late submitting so I’ll stop there…..  Onto THH, The Shadow had the option of selecting the theme this week.  He did a fine job and as usual went with a simple theme but Super Dave and I made it too complex.  In the end, it was Non-Super Bowl attendee vs. a Super Bowl winner but during my research, it could have easily been what Mormon who played for these teams did you like more.  It was very fascinating that probably 30% of all Mormons that have played in the NFL have played for the 49ers…. I feel much more educated now because of this research.  Onto this pick’em….

Shadow: The theme of this week’s THH, as brought to you by The Shadow, is Haves versus Have Nots.  Each matchup pits a team that has never even made it to the Super Bowl against a team that has gone and has never lost in the Super Bowl.  As a Denver Bronco fan, I can honestly say that I am not sure if it is worse to have never gone, or to have gone and never won, as I had to endure throughout my formative years with the Broncos.  I can tell you one thing, though, I truly hated each of the teams that defeated the Broncos in the Super Bowl, and some of that hatred still spills over today.  Thankfully, my team was able to capture a couple of big games, so that has tempered it a bit.

NFL

(Actual phrasing of Shadow’s message: I will give you one hint:  it has nothing to do with individual players or coaches)

Detroit @ San Francisco

 SD: This is the game that started all of the problems. You see, after getting Shadow’s email, I was in the car driving so I had some time to sit and think about the match-ups he selected. The main problem with this game is that there are too many connections between these two teams. Both teams were coached by Steve Mariucci. Matt Millen played for the Niners before destroying the Lions. Detroit was the site of the Niners first Super Bowl victory. San Francisco is one of the coolest cities in America. Detroit is not. However, as you will see none of these apply to the second game. Well as it turns out, one thing does apply. The Lions are one of five teams that have not even appeared in a Super Bowl (quick, name them all – you have until the end of today’s post, which should be about the same time it took me) and as we all know the Niners have appeared in and won 5 Super Bowls (another fun game, how many teams have won every one of their appearances in the Super Bowl. Let me see if I can come up with the list for that as well). So, that is our quandary today – do we cheer for a champion or take pity on the less unfortunate among us? I recognize that it is the holiday season and we should look out for our fellow man and all of that, so I guess the answer is obvious. You could even say that the Lions are the NFL equivalent of poor Tiny Time Cratchit. However, while it may be the holidays we are still Americans. And Americans love winners. Mostly so we can tear them down later, but we still love winners. So, you know what? Tiny Tim can suck it. God bless us, everyone? More like God blesses the winners. Go Niners.

Turner: Couldn’t be easier.  Given geography (why we have THH to begin with), the fact that I really have no reason to ever want another championship of any kind in Detroit, and the Niners are the GREATEST team ever, it has to be the fighting Alex Smiths.  The resurgence is back, the dynasty is being formed and hello Super Bowl in 3 years (as soon as we break in a new QB).  As SuperDave’s favorite shirt logo from this year, Who needs a V.D. when we have crabs (or other way around… )

Shadow: Even if it wasn’t for the pounding they put on my beloved Broncos in the Super Bowl, I was already insanely jealous over their success in the 80′s and had a couple of truly obnoxious bandwagon friends at school who not surprisingly would later become Cowboy fans in the 90′s…and I am sure if I kept in touch with them I would find they are currently Patriots fans.  I always felt bad for Barry Sanders being saddled with the Lions.  He deserved much better.  I am going to pull for Detroit in this one.

Tampa Bay @ New Orleans

SD: Another match-up of a Super Bowl winner and one of the Dreadful Five that have never made it to the Big Game. While the Saints have never made it to a Super Bowl, they have appeared in the THH quite regularly and I have to admit that this may be the first time their THH performance has resulted in my cheering against them. As much as I love everything about the Saints, they have no chance of competing with a Bucs team that won a Super Bowl while I cheered them on from a bar in downtown Washington D.C. where I may or may not have been sitting near Malcolm Jamal Warner. Sorry, Saints you can’t compete with Theo Huxtable. Though, I guess there is always a chance that I could someday cheer on a Saints Super Bowl appearance with Tempestt Bledsoe or Keshia Knight Pulliam. But until then, go Bucs.

Turner: Geaux Saints.  They need to win. The city needs a win. The falling down Super Dome with those awful colored splotched seats needs more revenue for renovation, Sean Payton & Drew Brees are greatness.  Tampa should have never won one and don’t deserve another one ever.  They aren’t even trying to field a competitive team. On the social scene, New Orleans has Bourbon street where you can see the real thing at every turn while in Tampa you get the original home of Hooters in nearby Clearwater where they just tease you. I don’t like being teased, it reminds me too much of 5^th grade where the kids picked me to always not be on their team and in 8^th grade where Elizabeth told me she ‘liked’ me.  It was a tease and I will never recover. 

Shadow: I actually loved it when the Bucs pummeled the Raiders.  The only thing worse than having to watch Rich Gannon carve up a Broncos defense is having to now listen to him commentate.  New Orleans has obviously had a long and storied tradition of suckitude, and I think the loss to the Cowboys is just what that team may have needed to harden them for a deep playoff run this year.  Let’s face it, New Orleans is easily the team “never to have gone to a Super Bowl” that is the closest to actually being able to remove that distinction.  And I really can’t hate them for it.  Let the Saints come Marching In!

Quiz answers:

No Super Bowl appearances: Detroit, New Orleans, Jacksonville, Cleveland, Houston.

Won every Super Bowl appearance (doing this from memory): San Francisco, Tampa Bay, New York Jets, Baltimore Ravens

You may remember this past summer, when Michael Jackson and Steve McNair died in the span of just a few days, I wrote a column about how the way someone dies shouldn’t overshadow the way they lived.

Well, in a slightly less lethal way, I was reminded of that lesson this week. You see, Mickey Andrews confirmed the worst kept secret in Tallahassee not involving Charlie Crist’s sex life. After 26 years with the Noles, Andrews, the defensive coordinator is retiring. While the myopic may look at the Noles giving up 34, 28, 44, 27 and 42 points already this season and say ‘well, he was going whether he wanted to or not’, it is only appropriate to take a step back and appreciate Andrews’ entire career.

Not only was Andrews’ defense the real key to making the Noles the best team in college football  for about a decade and a half (quick – how many quarterbacks can you name for the Noles from 1987 – 2000?) but he also helped teach some of the greatest defensive players in the game. Deion Sanders, Derrick Brooks – two of the best players at their position in the history of the sport learned from Andrews. And, given their off-the-field personalities, it is pretty clear Andrews is not a coach that requires mindless automatons unlike some other less flexible coaches. Add in other players like Terrell Buckley, LeRoy Butler, Marvin Jones, Pete Boulware, Bryant McFadden, Chris Hope, Lawrence Timmons, Darnell Dockett, Antonio Cromartie – Andrews has been responsible for more great players than Nick Saban, Pete Carroll and Jim Tressell combined.

While I may mock and curse the Noles disappointing performance this year, that doesn’t mean I have anything but respect for Mickey. So, enjoy your retirement Mickey.

Next year, you can join the rest of us in complaining about the Noles disappointing performance.

While, I am stuck working in San Francisco for the weekend, Turner and the Shadow have roadtripped to Lincoln for the OU/NU game. Sadly, they are only 24 years too late for it to really matter but never-the-less I am probably the first person mad to be stuck in San Francisco rather than Lincoln for the weekend.

Turner: Wednesday Nov 5^th:

From 30,000 feet above the great beige landscape of Wyoming, we are coming to you with the weekly edition of THH.  I’m a bit concerned about our readership as no one asked the question of why there were no NFL games?  I’m sure SuperDave will admit to his careless attention to detail and lack of focus of quality on this over-read blog.

The week thus far has consisted of Boise, ID.  Let me tell you of the GREATEST invention ever….Fry Sauce…… I will likely be starting a “frysauceblog” to rate and gather scientific information about the concoction of mayonnaise, ketchup, paprika, and horseradish (just one recipe) that might be the most heavenly thing since, well, hmmmmmm……. I’m not sure if there is a comparison.   Apparently this is a Northwest (or at least Idaho) thing.  Every restaurant has their own recipe and fast food restaurants carry it as part of their standard condiment package.  As the Shadow will attest, I found this one of the most amazing creations ever created.  So I have a new endeavor in life, and that is to spread the greatness of Fry Sauce to the rest of America.  If you haven’t tried, please use this opportunity to experience the essence of why food was put on this earth.   A condiment that can double as ‘soup’ and be eaten alone is truly a National Treasure.   

If you are a facebook aficionado (like SuperDave just became!) please visit the official site…

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Fry-Sauce/74421423291?v=feed&story_fbid=116075066313

Thursday Nov 6^th:

We aren’t quite in the air any more and we aren’t quite ready for football picks… We just passed the sign on Interstate 80 for the Original Pony Express Station somewhere in Western Nebraska.  The Shadow is flying at 80 mph in our Pontiac G6 while we listen to his variety of Taylor Swift, Def Leopard, Michael Jackson, and Tiffany.  Yes, I’m stuck in this silver bullet absolutely dying right now.  He took control of the radio and will not relinquish it.  The other issue I’m facing is that the Shadow will not turn on the in-car circulation and if you have every been to NE Colorado or Western Nebraska (or any of Nebraska), the putrid smell of cow manure has officially been absorbed into my OKC Thunder T-shirt and hair follicles.  I’m pretty sure if I’m suggest to a drug test over the next 6 months, I might fail b/c what has been absorbed into my system….. With that I must quickly supply a very short explanation b/c I am losing all oxygen b/c I officially can not breathe. This might be the last you’ll ever hear from me so I’m giving the Shadow my credentials to send this message upon my death.  It has been a good ride…. MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Shadow: People always give me crap for being a Yankee fan.  My first actual memories of baseball are from the Bucky Dent game in 1978, when I was 6 years old and sitting in the kitchen watching a tiny black and white TV with my dad, who was a big Yankees fan.  It was only natural that I would become one as well, and as I have told many friends over the years, I had to go from 1978-1996 before I got to witness another World Series victory, so don’t give me any sh*t about being some late ’90′s bandwagoner.  That being said, I am lucky enough to have gotten to enjoy 5 titles in the last 13 years, and have enjoyed every minute of it.  The Yankees have the most money, blah, blah, blah, blah.  Yeah, and I wish Iowa could recruit blue chips from the Southeast or California or Texas.   Every sport, although maybe Pro Football the least, has some sort of talent disparity, if not payroll disparity.  Get over it.  Okay, now that the rant is out of the way, I can try and summon up the hatred.

College

LSU @ Alabama

SD: This week, rather than coming up with some obscure reason to pick rooting interests in games no one actually cares about, we are entering the heavyweight division. We are picking the two biggest games of the week. First stop Tuscaloosa. I could argue that I am picking LSU because I don’t think Alabama can beat UF and I want to minimize the inevitable win for UF in the SEC title game. I could say that rather than hearing about Bama and UF playing a playoff game for the BCS title game in the SEC title game will drive me insane and a foregone conclusion of LSU losing again to UF would be much easier to digest. I could argue all of these things but really I am cheering for LSU because I have always felt that the fans of Baton Rouge were kindred spirits and even more importantly, because I would love to get more kindred with the female spirits of LSU, if you know what I mean. Oh yeah, and I hate Nick Saban.

Turner: Air Boats and Creole over Winnebago’s and BBQ

Shadow: With my Hawkeyes perched where they have never flown before in the BCS standings, it is only natural that all of my hatred is squarely focused on the three teams ahead of them, one of which is the Crimson Tide.  Every week I am hoping for a loss from Bama, and every week I am disappointed.  I am pulling for the Tigers here.

Ohio State @ Penn State

SD: In just about every other year, this game would be to decide who gets to go to the Rose Bowl (or BCS Title game) and get slaughtered by a more athletic team from the west or south. This year, however – thanks to Shadow’s boys from the creatively named Iowa City –  it is really only to decide who will take the lead in the recruiting battle for some ‘athletic’ (meaning athletic relative to the rest of his state) high school senior from either Ohio or Pennsylvania that will be the next savior of the Big Ten to come in and not really do much. Call it the Terrelle Pryor bowl. So, which fanbase takes the lead in the sweepstakes to mutter ‘damn, another fumble, at least it wasn’t another interception’ each week for the next half-decade? I will go with Ohio State only because it is always fun to watch Kirk Herbstreit try and rationalize how OSU is athletic enough this year to compete, when they never are.

Turner: On this one, the pick is for the Shadow… We need to fully root for PSU on this one so that in the event that Iowa ‘may’ (but definitely won’t) stumble against Ohio State in 2 weeks, the Hawkeyes still get to go to the Rose Bowl (with easy wins against Northwestern and Minnesota!!)  Ideally, they will be undefeated but this White Out win at least will guarantee the Rose Bowl for the Shadow, which he said he would attend!

Shadow: This one is going to be very petty and very self-serving.  I want Iowa to go undefeated.  If that is not going to happen, then I want them to win the Big 10 and play in the Rose Bowl for only the 3rd time while I have been cognizant of college football.  Both of the last two times (1985 and 1990) were utter failures.  I want them to go to the Rose Bowl and kick the ass of some Pac-10 team like we kick the ass of SEC teams in bowls.  We hold a win over Penn State.  We play Ohio State next week.  If Penn State beats Ohio State, then technically we could still lose to Ohio State and win the Big 10 based on them having 2 losses and us owning a win over Penn State.  So for this weekend, I am totally a supporter of Linebacker U.

NFL

Tennessee @ San Francisco

SD: My secret theme this week in the NFL is simple. Music. We are again visiting Tennessee (or the middle) but this time they are representing country music. San Fran, of course, is the home or adopted home of almost every important 60’s band. Despite reading Chuck Klosterman’s chapter on the retrospectively weird Garth Brooks /Chris Gaines experiment last week, I have to go with San Francisco. The Dead or the Gaitlin Brothers? Minnie Pearl or Janice Joplin? Grand Ole Opry or the Fillmore? Hee Haw or the Electic Kool Aid Acid Test? Please.

Turner: Pull my pants down for this one, Niners roll!!! 

Shadow: Vince Young versus Alex Smith.  Vince Young went to Texas.  Alex Smith was coached by Urban Meyer.  Vince Young singlehandedly beat Michigan and USC in back to back years on New Years Day.  Alex Smith led Utah to its only undefeated season ever.  Vince Young won a national title.  Alex Smith and Utah were one of the first “BCS Busters”.  Sense a trend here?  Exactly…we must focus on their college careers because each has been pretty much a bust to this point in the pros.  But both have another chance to grab the reins and turn their careers around.  How can we hate that?  We love second chance stories.  Call this one a push.

Detroit @ Seattle

SD: Motown versus the grunge movement. Well, next time I get home I will probably put on a flannel and I have several Pearl Jam songs on my Ipod. Does that answer your question as to which I am picking?

Turner: This one is for the Java, my operating system, and rain over gun-shots and….  Hmmm……Eminem??   Go ‘hawks!! 

Shadow: KISS versus Nirvana.  Pontiac Silverdome versus the Kingdome.   Starbucks coffee versus Little Caesar’s pizza.  How sucky would it be to have to be in Detroit where they hold one out of every 8 Super Bowls or so, and know that your team is far, far, far, far away from ever getting to the big dance, and there are no signs of a turnaround?   But, you know what…..I just really, really hate the Seahawks throwback jerseys.  More like throw-up jerseys.  Blecch.  Let’s see if the Lions can shock the world and double their win total to ’2′.