I woke up in Tallahassee this morning for the first time in about 4 years and last time I saw almost nothing outside of our RV tailgate and the stadium. I haven’t spent real time in Tallahassee since about 2002. Going to get coffee this morning, Turner and I walked around downtown Tallahassee, admiring the brick roads, old buildings and Spanish moss hanging from the trees. A rain storm passed through last night and the weather is perfect; almost cool in the shade but warm in the sun with low humidity. In the, shockingly cool, dry air a hint of anticipation rides over everything as everyone in town has only one thing on their mind: the game.

In summary, I am in heaven.

I am almost left feeling a little pre-emptively sad for when we leave on Sunday. After the anticipation and build up: returning to a town where I lived for seven years and really grew up for what is the biggest college football game of the season – and the last 10 years for Florida State.

I am also feeling nostalgic for the ‘good old days’ – when FSU had top five match-ups every year and I was a young wide-eyed kid from the mountains of Colorado.

Our THH theme this week seems especially appropriate for my current wistful mindset. All about the here and the now versus the past.

Let’s just hope that Saturday night combines the best of both worlds; a great game today that reminds me of the dominant FSU teams of yesterday.

Turner couldn’t join us this week, as he is curled up in the fetal position, mumbling ‘Boomer Sooner’ to himself repeatedly preparing for tomorrow. But old friend Shadow is doing double duty this week.

Shadow: I am going to Hawaii on Monday.  For a week.  Just me and Mrs. Shadow.  This should make me happy.  So why do I only feel complete jealousy at Superdave and Turner spending 96 hours of quality time with college football, alcohol, food that is bad for you, and meaningful talks late into the night like in Stand by Me.  Let’s get to the hate before I start to get verklempt (again).

The Rules: One team in each of our THH match-ups had a distinguished period where they were one of the best around while the other is currently one of the best teams (sort of like a certain game in the panhandle of Florida this weekend). Which team do you like more – the one that was great or the one that is great?

(Clarification: the past team is based on the team at that time. So if you were a huge Ken Dorsey fan, he would be a deciding factor, not the current Cane trainwreck)

College:

Utah v BYU

SD: So we are stretching things a little as Utah went from BCS buster and perennial Cinderella to mid-pack PAC-12 team. But they are still more relevant than a BYU team that won a national championship in the eighties but now annually has 1 or 2 decent wins and 1 or 2 head scratching losses. Just like another mediocre, independent religious school that gets slightly more publicity for no reason. I am just happy to make a Notre Dame joke when discussing two completely unrelated schools. I will take Utah here, simply it is still a travesty that BYU won the national title over OU in 1985. (I have now fulfilled a contractual obligation to say one nice thing about OU.

Shadow: This one really has me torn.  For most of my teenagehood I absolutely hated BYU because I was a huge Air Force fan and was pretty much going to be a fighter pilot when I grew up.  But for one really screwed up year, I was in love with a Mormon girl, so I convinced myself I loved BYU….to the point where I even applied to go there.  Because of these conflicting memories…I think I will just go with the Utes.

OSU v Miami

SD: The U of old was easy to hate. No team has ever embraced the bad guy role like the late 80’s/early 90’s Miami teams. It was a more innocent time in the late 80’s, back when a young naïve Alaskan sportscasters could sleep with a visiting college athlete without worrying whether it would end their political aspirations and implode something called the internet that had yet to be given to the public. The U was something new, and for many people, kind of scary. They wanted to be loathed. They fed on people’s hate (and on really nice meals paid for by Luther Campbell eaten off of strippers). I miss that. I may have hated The U, but I loved the U for that. It gave us an enemy. But they were also so incredibly talented that you had to respect both their play and their “I don’t give a f**k.” attitude. I wish more teams would embrace the Darth Vader role. In fact, if another extremely talented team in Miami would tap their inner-U they would be a lot more entertaining. But LeBron wants to be Jerry Rice, not Michael Irvin. And because of that he will never be as legendary as either.

Shadow: Since one of my greatest wishes is for both of these teams to forever be irrelevant, this is an excellent use of the hierarchy.  Miami isn’t in my favorite team’s conference.  Point in their favor.  I also think they were royally screwed in their title game against OSU.  Point in their favor.  Plus when they were the cream of the college football crop, they were actually pretty fun to watch.  I could never say that about any incarnation of OSU.  GO Canes.

NFL:

Jacksonville @ NY Jets

SD: It is easy to forget now, that for a few years the Jaguars were considered one of the 2 or 3 best teams in the NFL. They almost always had a great regular season record and got close in the playoffs before losing short of the Super Bowl. Mark Brunell, Fred Taylor, Jimmy Smith and Tom Coughlin were the Philip Rivers, LaDanian Tomlinson, Vince Jackson and Norv Turner of their day. But since I attended the game where the Broncos beat them on their way to their first Super Bowl victory in 1997, I can’t have much hatred. Not nearly as much as I have for loud-talking, lots-of-food eating Rex Ryan and swimsuit model/part-time quarterback Mark Sanchez.

Shadow: Seeing as how Jacksonville’s window of distinction coincides with brutal memories of what could have been a third ring for Elway and TD, I just can’t see myself on their side.  I may dislike Rex and San-Cheez, but part of it is minor jealousy when I think the Broncos aren’t too far behind the Jets personnel-wise, yet we fail to win close games where the Jets seem to.  I guess I will pull for the Broadway Boys here.

Green Bay @ Carolina

SD: It says something that football junkie Shadow questioned the inclusion of the Panthers as a ‘team that was once one of the best around’. A victim of timing, lost in the sands of time as one of those anonymous teams that lead the NFC in a time of AFC dominance it is easy to forget tha tin a 3 year span they played in both a Super Bowl and 2 NFC title games. Sort of like the Browns of the late 80’s – without a defining failure like The Drive or The Fumble. However, I really like our reigning Super Bowl champs. A happy, young, tight-knit team with a strong front office and the best fan base in sports. So Go Pack Go. Wipe away the memories of Jake Delhomme and Muhsin Muhammed. It is time for Panther fans to create a new dynasty anyway. Sort of like my Noles. 32 hours to kick off, gulp…

Shadow: A funny thing happens when your team isn’t QB’d by a tired, old gunslinger who should have been glue years ago…..you become instantly more likeable.  Maybe it is still part of the Super Bowl hangover and watching them put it to one of my least favorite teams….but the Panthers don’t have a shot here.  I will take the championship belt antics of Aaron Rodgers and the rest of the Cheeseheads.

Last night, Randy Shannon, head coach at THE U – the University of Miami – was fired. There will be many explanations put forth to explain why Shannon was shown the door for a record that the Miami Heat can only dream of. But, in the end, Shannon’s firing can be summed up in 4 simple words:

Jimbo Fisher

And

Bo Pellini

All three coaches were brought into resurrect historically dominant programs that had fallen on hard times in recent years.

All three programs sill had recruiting successes: they were still getting the athletes that are an absolute requirement to succeed in college football.

Jimbo Fisher just completed his first regular season at 9-3. His team is playing in the ACC title game and he beat his two biggest rivals by a combined 76-24. After being the benefactor of Bowden’s “retirement” and his comparison pushing out Shannon, Fisher is responsible for more people losing their jobs than Dick Fuld, Lehman Brothers CEO.

Bo Pellini just completed his 3^rd regular season with a 10-2 record. He is about to appear in his second consecutive Big Twelve title game.

Randy Shannon just completed his 4^th season with a 7-5 record. His best season was last year at 9-4. He has never made an ACC championship game or won a bowl game (he was 0-2). He was 28-22 overall and .500 in the mediocre ACC (16-16).

In short, despite annually having one of the highest ranked recruiting classes and highest profile programs in the country, Shannon’s Miami teams were the very definition of mediocrity.

It doesn’t take much to get players to come to Miami – just ask Pat Riley – but it does take more than athletic talent to succeed – just ask Erik Spoelstra. Shannon, by all accounts is a nice and classy man, who was clearly respected and liked by his team.

But that doesn’t make him a good coach.

In the wake of a solid 20 years of poor behavior by Miami players, Shannon was asked to clean up the program – stressing academic success and civic minded behavior. He was a success at this.

But in the end, a football coach is not measured on passing classes and reduced arrests, he is measured in wins on the football field – just ask Urban Meyer.

Meyer has turned the University of Florida into a halfway house for juvenile delinquents. But he has also turned around the University of Florida into a national football powerhouse (until this year at least) and is beloved by anyone in central Florida with a mullet and a pair of jorts.

Shannon was in part a victim of circumstance. He was asked to make the Canes respectable off the field – which he did – but that was ignored when his fine citizens lost on the field.

He was asked to reinvigorate the passion of the most fair-weather of fan bases (90% of whom have no connection with the school other than the desire to cheer on a winner), at the same time the team moved from one of the most intimidating home fields in the country to a half empty, soul-less corporate stadium an hour from campus.

In the end, it seems the Miami administration looked at what the Canes were doing on the field (losing to USF and Virginia and getting crushed by rivals FSU and Virginia Tech) and what other schools were doing and decided Shannon’s likable, easy-going manner wasn’t doing it.

In one year Fisher has achieved more than Shannon did in four years. He also appeared to do it with integrity – kicking players off the team prior to the season – proving you don’t have to sell your soul to the Devil, Urban Meyer style to succeed.

Pellini has been able to turn lesser athletes than Miami recruits into a success and though his administrators may not appreciate his full throated screaming at players and refs on national TV, they at least recognize his passion. Shannon’s passive demeanor just seemed like the most superficial signal of a less-than-all-consuming desire to win games.

Should Shannon have been fired? I don’t know. He was a victim of the success of others and the unwinnable situation in which he was placed.

But he also failed to win. And at THE U, a school defined by its football field success and outlaw image, that is the worst rule you can break.

Hi, my name is Dave and I hate the BCS

<Hi Dave>

I am firm believer that the BCS is a waste of time and the NCAA needs to do one of two things: (1) revert to the classic bowl system to keep tradition alive and acknowledge that chaos will reign on occasion or (2) figure out a playoff system. The BCS system or anything else in between is as uncomfortable and joyless as a Viking win is for Vikings fans this season. Sure, it means a win for their team but it also means if they do too well they could be stuck with Brad Childress for another year.

With that in mind, as well as my general dislike for the NCAA as a governing body, I have decided this year I am all-in for complete chaos. Not only do I want Auburn to make the BCS title game with possible forfeiture of all their games hanging over their heads but I want Cam Newton to win the Heisman also. In a perfect world, he wins the Heisman and Auburn wins a spot in the BCS title game and then all allegations are found to be true on about December 26th. What happens then?

Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling!

Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes…

The dead rising from the grave!

Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together… mass hysteria!

Ok, maybe not all of that. But have you noticed a serious uptick in zombies lately?

Coincidence?

The institutional bureaucracy that the NCAA has created seems designed specifically to drag out any investigations of wrong-doing for as long as possible, so as to not distract from the play on the field. When it has come to the allegations against Cam Newton the NCAA has reacted slower than the Bush White House did in sniffing out the leaker in the Valerie Plame case. But in a 24×7 internet-fueled news-cycle, this can’t last. Especially not if the Feds start looking around as well. The NCAA can try to delay and delay but it will only harm them more in the end. Especially if it comes out that the NCAA had the information all along but slow-played it to get through the season first.

After years of hypocritical money-grubbing the NCAA has backed itself into a corner.

With coaches making millions and vague promises of millions to come later to their recruits, it was only a matter of time until those same recruits decide to jump the gun on receiving some of those benefits.

After the NCAA spent years designing a football championship system to specifically reward its largest members with even more money, it was only natural that other worthy contenders stand up and yell ‘what about us?’

This year we have a perfect storm – two outsiders with legitimate arguments that they deserve an invite to a party and a big-dog that may have been caught with it’s paw in the Milk-Bone container.

NOTE: After last weekend, I have also decided Boise State would beat Auburn handily in a bowl game. Boise has proven repeatedly that they can find a way to slow down a faster, more talented offense (Va Tech this season, Oregon and TCU last season, OU back in 2007) but after watching the freshman Aaron Murray of Georgia pick apart the Auburn defense for 4 quarters I am sure Kellen Moore could throw for 400 yards and 5 TDs against them.

The NCAA’s relentless pursuit of more money for its privileged institutions was inevitably going to lead to its demise. They staved off killing college basketball when cooler heads prevailed over expanding March Madness to 96 teams.

What happens if or when they have a team playing for a championship that has already been deemed illegitimate?

Mass hysteria? Or worse.

If we do end up with human sacrifice, I have an idea on the first slate of candidates.

On to THH this week. More themes because, well, we have pretty much exhausted most interesting match-ups over the last three years and Turner and Shadow keep telling me how much they enjoy the themes.

Right before they don’t participate.

Actually, somebody made it this week, so my scorn is limited to one of my cohorts.

Shadow: My consistency in getting my blog post written is similar to the Broncos this year.  Sometimes it’s a double-digit drubbing of KC, and sometimes I am getting my ass handed to me by the hated Raiders.  I am also fighting a semi-bad case of the “I just don’t care anymore”, partly due to Iowa losing games it has no business losing, the Broncos sucking, and all of my fantasy teams tanking.  It has been a challenging football year….but at least it is Ohio State weekend.  Beating them will still give me reason to be happy over this somewhat “lost” season.

College: (The Your Enemy is My Enemy Division)

Virginia Tech @ Miami – Pick the game based on who Super Dave hates more

SD: This may surprise you but I am going with the Hokies here. Sure I could lament the fact that my Noles trounced the Canes on the field and have the same record yet sit several spots behind them in the polls but it is precisely because of that trouncing I can’t hate the Canes too much. Despite the hopes and dreams of Kirk Herbstreit and much of the national press, the Miami of old ain’t coming back any time soon. Randy Shannon may be a great recruiter but, for all appearances, his coaching skills are on par with Dan Hawkins. How can you hate something so sad and pitiful? Va Tech, however every year gets all the hype with none of the performance. If any team gets more unwarranted free passes from the experts for throwing up at least one stink-bomb per year I don’t know who it is. The ridiculous Beamer Ball cliché gets trotted out in every VT game more often than Jay Cutler throws interceptions. So, yes, today I hate VT more than the Canes.

Shadow: Wow.  This is kind of tense, like a test or something.  Even though Mike Vick’s brother was a chest stomping fool in his Va Tech days, I have to believe that SD harbors more hate for that Halfway House posing as a college in southern Florida.  It’s bad enough when they were having success….it’s even worse how their alums are some of the most pathetic bandwagoners around.  The U having a good year?  Sidelines full of former Canes.  A down year (or series of years)…and suddenly everyone has better things to do.  Go Hokies.

Nebraska @ Texas A&M – Pick the game based on who Turner hates more

SD: Tough call, as I know a bad taste sits in Turner’s mouth from his trip to Lincoln last fall (and not just from the jell-o shots he did) but I am going with the Aggies. With OU’s recent embarrassing loss to A&M fresh in his mind as well as some lingering sub-conscious resentment that he didn’t go to a school that encouraged you to make out with a co-ed after each touchdown (really his best chance at making out with a girl), I think it is ‘down with Lassie’ all the way for him today.

Shadow: Texas A&M has given Turner his most recent pain, but having to sit through the loss in Lincoln last year, and all of the grudge matches through his formative years, has to keep the Huskers on top of this 2 team hierarchy.  Aggies all the way.

NFL (SAT-like Quarterback Theoreticals Division)

Your team is trailing 27-21 with 2 minutes left in the Super Bowl. Your team has the ball on its own 17 yard line but your quarterback’s ACL just blinded a 7-year old in the 4^th row on the last play. Which of the starting quarterbacks in each game do you pick the lead your team and why.

(For the record this is an interesting game for A LOT of matchups this week)

Buffalo @ Cincinnati

SD: I picked this match-up because this includes a couple equally underwhelming quarterbacks: Ryan Fitzpatrick of Buffalo and Carson Palmer of Cincinnati. One of these two was a Heisman trophy winner at USC. The other went to noted football factory Harvard. I am going with the old Harvard Yard,  Fitzpatrick. Palmer has had plenty of opportunities over the years to lead his team to a big victory and he has consistently failed. At least Fitzpatrick doesn’t carry around that sort of baggage. He can go into this 2-minute drill with the same inexperienced cockiness of the Winklevoss twins. And even if he does fail to win the game, he can probably make it up to me by making me a small fortune on Wall Street.

Shadow: The easy and flashy answer here is that one-time can’t miss Trojan.  But here is my biggest problem with him.  I honestly want the QB to be the leader of my team.  Let’s be honest.  Carson has never been the leader in that locker room or that organization.  I don’t really care what his athletic skills may or may not be….he cannot lead.  Ryan Fitzpatrick may not be in any spotlights right now…but that may be good for him, as his shortcomings aren’t front and center either.  Plus he is young.  I will take youthful and energetic over a non-leader like Palmer any day.

Indy @ New England

SD: In the polar opposite of our first match-up we have two of the very best quarterbacks to choose from. However this one is pretty easy to pick. Brady has been in this situation twice and owns two rings to show for it. Manning was in this situation last season and Tracy Porter now has a ring to show for it. And, for those with memory loss, Porter doesn’t play for Manning’s team.

Shadow: Come on.  Peyton’s commercials are legendary compared to Mr. Bieber-head.  I liked Peyton’s SNL better than Brady’s too.  This question all really comes down to the supporting cast.  If I have play-making WR’s and a great TE, I am picking Peyton.  If I have just marginal positional players, I want Brady in there.  To me, Brady can raise the level of players around him, while I think Peyton thrives on having a supporting cast that is a notch above, and gets frustrated when he doesn’t have that.  Peyton may be one of the best at adjustments and audibles before the snap, but Brady is the much better improviser once the ball is in play…and in a two minute drill that is what really matters.  Give me Tom.

It is a common malady of approaching middle age to reminisce about the past. The stereotypes for this are those unfortunate souls who seemed to peak in life as the big men of their high school. The Captain of the football team or the Homecoming King who never quite get their life together after graduation day and twenty years later still talk about when they were the biggest fish in the small aquarium that was their high school.

I like to think I have avoided this fate for the most part. I have had plenty of successes since graduating high school: a fine college career; good job that allows me that opportunity to do things I want to do – whether it is a weekend trip to Vegas or a couple weeks in Europe; a hobby of writing anonymously on the internet for the entertainment of myself and about 4 other people. By any reasonable definition my life does not suck.

Yet, for at least one Saturday in 2010, football made me think about when I was younger. The college game we have come to know over the last few years seems to be gone. But it isn’t a new world. It is an old world. Like 1997. The college football world hasn’t so much evolved as it has regressed.

After a decade with just a short list of contenders each year playing hot potato with the national championship, suddenly an entirely new cast has risen up. Some are new players that a decade ago were the punchline of a joke about painted fields or lame mascots.

But for at least one Saturday the headline makers weren’t the new kids on the block. They were schools and people at the top of the game back when New Kids on the Block were being re-packaged and re-sold as The Backstreet Boys.

Even before the weekend officially started, Nebraska made a statement that they are to be reckoned with for the first time in a decade. Going into the Little Apple and decimating Kansas State on national TV, the Huskers combined an option-oriented offense almost indistinguishable from the offenses led by Tommy Frazier and Scott Frost with a defense that finally resembles the Black Shirt teams of the 1990’s that were the standard bearers for defense before Nick Saban’s teams stole it’s belt.

Combine an embarrassingly bad Big Twelve North, a down Texas and no Oklahoma until the Big Twelve title game and the Huskers should coast for quite awhile at this point. Much like those Husker teams of the 90’s, we won’t know how good this team really is but I can’t be the only one excited for a late season Oklahoma/Nebraska game that decides the conference title.

Saturday’s biggest headline maker was the Ol’ Ball Coach. Rendered humble, and worse for his ego, inconsequential, for his entire tenure at South Carolina, Spurrier’s Gamecocks rose up and took down the #1 Crimson Tide. He doesn’t have the wide open attack that he used at Florida to dominate the SEC for the 1990’s but he does have a solid running back playing the Fred Taylor role and a quarterback that for at least one day had more good plays than bad plays. I always loathed Spurrier when he was coaching the Gators: his arrogance, his style, his dominance, all of it combined to make him completely insufferable.

But now, after his humiliation with the Redskins and years of being an SEC East doormat, he has returned as the slightly quieter, more mature Ol’ Ball Coach. The visor was still there, but this time he wasn’t spiking it to the ground after bad plays. 

Maybe it is just relative to his SEC cohorts Nick Saban and Urban Meyer but I find myself almost rooting for Spurrier.

Spurrier’s old team, the Gators also seems to have reverted to the team we got to know in the late 90’s and early 00’s. After years of riding his Holiness Tebow to greatness the Gators appear to be absolutely pedestrian. No playmakers on offense (a secret weakness Tebow was able to conceal since Percy Harvin left school), and a suspect defense. It is fun to watch the genius Urban Meyer consistently fail when he doesn’t have a supremely talented QB leading his team (he gained notoriety at Utah dominating the Mountain West with future #1 overall draft pick Alex Smith – which at a minimum proves the NFC West may not be great but it is better than the Mountain West). LSU coming into Gainesville and beating the Gators not only proves Les Miles is the Austin Powers of college football (he screws up everything, yet it all works out perfectly in the end) but also that Urban’s team has fallen further than anyone realized.

All of the above are just the individual trees in a more important forest: the SEC isn’t what it was. The SEC has won 4 straight national titles but they are going to need a lot of help from the brainwashed sheep that make up the polls to get a chance at a fifth. South Carolina lost to Auburn. Auburn almost lost to Kentucky. LSU should have lost to Tennessee. Tennessee then went out and got destroyed by Georgia. A team that the week before lost to Colorado.

It wasn’t too long ago that the SEC was a conference of tradition-rich programs that were good but not great. There would be several ranked teams but rarely would one figure in the national title conversation. There weren’t great teams that could win week in and week out. They would inevitably fall short one week, like Alabama on Saturday. From 1990 to 2005, SEC teams played for the national title as many times as they have in the last four years. (Bama in ‘92, UF in ‘95 and ‘96, Tennessee in ‘98).

Speaking of another team missing a key ingredient that kept them in the national title conversation the USC Trojans found a way to lose to Stanford. We have been conditioned to think of USC as a perennial power, but as we have discussed, before Pete Carroll showed up USC was mediocre. Bringing in Lane Kiffin is just the first step in devolving back to a USC program that we saw with such luminaries and Paul Hackett and Larry Smith.

Last but, by far, the most important development of Saturday (at least for me) was Florida State’s utter demolition of Miami.

In a series that is known for close games and painful endings, the Seminoles came out Saturday night and pounded the Canes. In fact, they pounded them worse than any game since…1997.

It wasn’t just that the Noles won big and when in previous years they would have let the Canes back in to the game they instead stepped on their throats. It was how they won. They won by running the ball and playing defense. They have become the Penn State Nittany Lions. They have become Bill Parcells’ New York Giants.

After years of the Seminoles playing one good game and then getting embarrassed the following week, usually on the road in the ACC, this team has won 3 straight games; two on the road, all in the ACC, with the closest game being a 20 point win at UVA.

They aren’t fluky wins. They aren’t blocking field goals or returning kick-offs for touchdowns. They aren’t even using fast wide receivers to pick up 15 to 20 yards per pass. They are handing the ball off to a bevy of quick running backs and letting them run behind a grown-up offensive line. Two FSU quarterbacks won Heisman trophies by leading a high powered offense. This year, Christian Ponder lost the Heisman when the Noles got embarrassed by Oklahoma and now has turned the team around by putting stats aside and becoming the change of pace from the running game.

I may not recognize how they won, but it still doesn’t change how it makes me feel.

It makes me feel old.

In each of the last two years, just as the heat of summer starts to get to me and I wonder if football season will ever arrive, Fox College Sports Atlantic has given me a glimmer of hope by re-showing classic Seminole games that were important to the school and important to me.

First came a replay of the 1993 FSU/UF game, a pivotal win during my freshman year on the way to FSU’s first national title that was also Warrick Dunn’s coming out party.

Next came the 2003 domination of Notre Dame in South Bend, the worst shut out loss for the Irish in decades and the second greatest game of Chris Rix’s life. I attended in the midst of a move from D.C. to Denver.

However, after these mid-summer highlights the following Seminole seasons were…ummmm…let’s just say ‘not-quite-up-to-expectations’.

So this year I am mixing it up. Today, I am watching the 2000 Florida State/Miami game. One of the 5 most painful losses of my Seminole-cheering life.

I am willing to sacrifice here in July so that the fall will be full of joy for all of Seminole nation.

You might think I am insane for choosing to watch a ten year old college football game on a summer Saturday afternoon but do you know what ESPN is showing today? The Harlem Globetrotters. Now who’s pathetic?

On to the show.

- After the last couple years of having Seminole greats be our hosts, this year it is all Canes, Ken Dorsey, former offensive lineman Joaquin Gonzalez and our host Steve Walsh. I am surprised Dorsey and Walsh were available.

 - They start talking about how great FSU is, which sounds very generous, until you remember they win and therefore are basically bragging that they are even greater.

- For the record I watched this game live with the DC Seminole club at a suburban Virginia sports bar. The Mrs. and I shared a table with another couple we hadn’t met before. After three hours of watching in horror as the Mrs. and I screamed and yelled at the television, we would never see them again. Oh well, their loss.

- Hard to believe now that FSU came into this game without a regular season loss in over two years – 26 straight regular season wins as well as a 17 game winning streak in all games. Going into 2010, in the last 25 regular season games the Seminoles have ten losses.  Let’s not talk about this further, ok?

- And we have kick-off. Fumble by the Canes on the opening kick-off and the Noles recover on the Canes 25-yard line. I have a good feeling about this game.

- At quarterback, 28-year old Chris Wienke. He played baseball for several years before coming to FSU which explains his age. But seeing his receding hair line, it makes you wonder if maybe he also learned from the latino baseball players to shave a few years off his real age for the media guide.

- Three straight runs leaves FSU with a short 4^th down. The Rooster, Marcus Outzen comes in for a quarterback sneak. As with most things involving Outzen on the football field (see: 1998 National Championship game), nothing good comes from it for the Noles. Turnover.

- Starting for the Canes, Ken Dorsey – a young sophomore. I think he might have a bright future in Coral Gables.

- It is strange to see Chris Weinke against Ken Dorsey in an important game. This time of year you would expect to see them only in the 3^rd quarter of a pre-season NFL game.

- Canes offense includes Najeh Davenport, Bryant McKinney, Reggie Wayne and Santana Moss. With a decade of NFL experience since this game, the loss seems a little more understandable. It is also allows me to make poop jokes about Davenport.

- Seminole defense holds the Canes to a punt. This time the Noles fumble it on the punt return and the Canes recover around mid-field.

- The Canes are driving with running back James Jackson. Of all the players from Miami, how is some dude I don’t even remember the one that is dominating FSU? I hate the Canes.

- Davenport breaks right up the middle on a little pop pass and Dorsey finds him as he leaves skid marks on the way to an easy touchdown. Davenport lobbies for the Canes to go for 2 but the Canes kick the extra point.

- To add at least a little joy to this painful experience, let’s see if I can make a poop related joke every time I mention Najeh. So far so good.

- We come back to a conversation with Walsh and Dorsey. Apparently play-action passes were the Canes key innovation for this game by offensive coordinator Larry Coker. Gee, way to get creative Larry, no wonder your coaching career was so great after Butch Davis’s recruits graduated. I mean left school. God knows about 4% of Cane players can even spell graduation.

- Junior Robert Morgan drops a deep pass on FSU’s next possession, though we are reminded that he has great hands. Despite all evidence to the contrary apparently.

- Weinke scrambles a little and completes a pass down the sideline to Snoop Minnis. Also known as Marvin. Also known as the best receiver on FSU in 2000. Also known as the guy who is too dumb to stay academically eligible for the national title game later against Oklahoma. But I’m not bitter.

- I had forgotten that Weinke had a sore foot this game. This retro-actively becomes my excuse for the Noles losing this game. Gutty to play it so close against Miami with an injured quarterback.

- FSU doesn’t pick up a long third down but instead of sending in freshman Matt Munyon to kick a short field goal, Ed Reed knocks away a Weinke pass in the end zone on 4th. This fear of the kicker (two red zone trips, no points) for the Noles – I am sure will have no impact later in the game.

- Dorsey immediately responds with a deep pass to Santana Moss to flip the field. Watching this game was the worst idea I have ever had not involving the word ‘tequila’ and ‘chubby chasing’.

- Some random senior tight end named Ivan Mercer catches a pass to put the ball inside the ten at the end of the first quarter. Insert your own Rocky 4 joke here. I am sure he was wide open because he was a nobody. If he was a bigger name like Jeremy Shockey or Kellen Winslow, Jr. I bet FSU would have blanket coverage on him.

- Pass Interference called on Tay Cody on a pass to Reggie Wayne. Automatic first down for the Canes on the 7 yard line.

- Bronco linebacker D.J. Williams gets the hand-off to power in a touchdown run from the fullback position. 14-0 Miami. If I had remembered this when he got to Denver, I would have been much less forgiving of his mediocre Bronco career.

- We have skipped the next FSU series and Dorsey and the Cane offense has the ball on the FSU 31-yard line. Having watched the Nole versions of these telecasts before, I know that this can’t be good.

- Wow. Miami stuffed and misses the field goal wide right. I am sure that means all of the bad kicking karma has transferred from FSU to Miami.

- Weinke hits Anquan Boldin who scrambles up the sideline for a nice gain. As great an offense as FSU had, it should be noted Anquan is the only player to go on to a significant NFL career. That is what I love about FSU, the team is made up of overmatched, underdog, feel-good stories.

- A nice gain is followed by a Weinke interception by Ed Reed at the goal line. How did this game come down to the final play?

- We have fast forwarded again to late in the 2^nd quarter. Miami ball around their 20.

- The Canes are marching down with long passes to Santana Moss and punishing runs up the middle. I don’t like where this is going.

- FSU defense holds again around the fifteen. But the Canes convert the field goal and lead 17-0. This is looking like the FSU we have seen every year since 2000, I had forgotten that they looked like this in 2000 as well.

- On the ensuing drive, Weinke somehow avoids the rush hopping on one leg and flicks the ball down the field to Snoop who gets across the 50 yard line.

- It is also reported that Minnis has got bitches in the living room gettin’ it on but that is unconfirmed. Seminoles finally showing a little life just before halftime.

- Finally a successful Seminole running play. The dirty secret of FSU’s success in the 90’s: outside of the Warrick Dunn years, the Noles could never run the ball consistently but their passing game was so good it made up for it. Travis Minor came in with a high school reputation of ‘better than Warrick Dunn’. Oh, you don’t remember any big plays by him in a Seminole uniform? Exactly.

- In this game, Minor has been replaced by Jeff Chaney, who sadly has not yet shot any Canes in the face with a shotgun.

- On third and goal from the two yard line, Dan Morgan steps in for an interception to clinch a 17-0 Cane lead at halftime. Amazing, he held on to the ball. With the amount of grease in his hair some of it must have gotten on his hands.

- FSU opens up the second half with a couple strong runs and a long pass to Atrews Bell who gets the ball inside the 10 yard line of Miami.

- Swing pass to Minor, a Minor run up the middle and a Minor off-tackle run are stuffed on 1^st, 2^nd and 3^rd and goal. See, told you so about Minor. And I really did write that comment above before this happened.

- Bowden finally sends in his kicker for a chip shot from the 3 yard line. 17-3.

- Ooh, FSU has the ball back, so we have skipped a Cane offensive series. I love it when that happens.

- Weinke zips a pass down the sideline to Anquan Boldin who sidesteps a Cane corner and glides into the end zone untouched for a 48-yard touchdown. Say what you will about Weinke’s pro career and hair line, the dude could sling the ball. And I think the doctors wanted to amputate his leg before the game but he refused. 17-10 Miami

- – Weinke looks so dominating this quarter it is almost unfair. Sort of like the time I saw him pick a fight at Ken’s Bar in Tallahassee with a guy that might have been 5’6”.

- We take a break from the game to hear about the pro careers of Steve, Ken and Joaquin. Let me summarize much quicker than they did. They have accomplished about as much in the pros as I have.

- Skipping over two drives, the Canes have the ball and begin driving with completions to Wayne and Williams. It is jarring to see the difference in the number of future pros between the two offenses. Ok, forget the ‘future’ part; I am sure most of the Canes are already getting paid at the time of this game.

- Najeh Davenport drops a load on the FSU linebacking corps with a run up the middle

- There is a Seminole corner named Cookie Thomas. I wish he played for the Canes, so I could make a joke or two about his crumbling in the heat.  

- Miami kicks a field goal to take a 20-10 lead after Cookie jars up a fade pattern to Wayne.

- We have skipped a couple more drives and the Noles have the ball early in the 4^th quarter.

- Ooh, before they were stars! Greg Schiano coaching the Cane defense, now head coach at Rutgers. So we might be watching the last time he beats a top five team. And no, I don’t count 2007 when Louisville and West Virginia were briefly in the top five along with about 23 other teams. That year should get an asterisk like Roger Maris’ home run record.

- As far as the Noles have fallen since this game, it is comforting to see some things haven’t changed: an over reliance on the swing pass and no inside running game.

- Wait, that isn’t comforting at all. That is completely depressing.

- Matt Munyon misses a 23-yard field goal after a total jinx by the announcers when they discussed all the misses by him in pre-game warm-ups. Thanks guys. I am going to say that given the Noles’ history they didn’t need the extra jinx.

- Skipping a couple more series, Weinke and the Noles have the ball back still trailing by ten. Weinke leans on a walker with tennis balls on the ends to get to the huddle. Gritty performance.

- Weinke misses an open Boldin across the middle on third down forcing a punt. Weinke hobbles off after the play and appears to replace his own Achilles heel on the sideline by taking a ligament from a freshman walk-on wide receiver. Unfortunately he chose kicker Matt Munyon. The rest of this game is making more sense now.  

- Announcers just compared Dorsey to Bernie Kosar. Unclear whether that is a compliment or insult. If Bernie were here, he would be happy to tell you all about his fantastic career while sounding like he had a fifth of Jim Beam. Or he fought Mike Tyson. Or both.

- I obviously know how this game ends, but I don’t remember the final score, so I find myself surprisingly unsure as to what happens the rest of the way. While in the back of my mind knowing that ultimately there is one guaranteed result: pain.

- Canes forced to punt and the Noles get the ball on the ten with a little over five minutes to play.

- First play and Weinke finds Snoop for a 40 plus yard gain across the fifty. Snoop is good for catching those long passes but that doesn’t change the face that he doesn’t love them hos.

- A few plays later Weinke finds Boldin on the sideline inside the 5-yard line. Might be the worst thing to happen for the Noles as they will feel the need to run up the middle for no gain.

- Canes PA just played ‘Who Let the Dogs Out’. Is that song the Ice, Ice Baby of 2000? Close call as to what song from this time had a shorter shelf life: Who Let the Dogs Out or Mambo #5.

- Weinke pass to Boldin over the middle. Touchdown. 20-17 with 3:15 to play.

- Miami seems to be intent on giving the Noles every chance to win this game. I have never seen a team with a strong running game pass the ball more often late in the 4^th milking a lead. Shocking that Butch Davis wasn’t more successful in the pros.

 - Pass to Davenport over the middle but he dumps the ball and the Noles recover around midfield. I think the Noles can win this thing!

- Pass over the middle and Atrews Bell catches the touchdown pass!! 24-20 Noles with a 1:37 to play. The comeback is complete!

- Canes get the ball and start dinking and dunking their way down the field. First catch of the day by some sophomore named Jeremy Shockey. He looks like a nice, clean-cut kid.

- Canes move to a first and goal with 50 seconds left.

- Oops. Joaquin, one of our hosts, just false-started. Let’s hope Walsh asks him about that play and Joaquin retorts by asking Walsh about that two-point conversion at Notre Dame in 1988.

- Shockey with a touchdown over the middle. First of his career. I wonder if he went out and got his first tattoo after this game? 27-24 Miami.

- They just showed Michael Irvin on the Cane sideline congratulating Shockey. I wonder if he offered the kid strippers or blow as a reward for the touchdown?

- Two short passes and the Noles get past the thirty. Another swing pass to Minor and the ball moves to the 45-yard line.

- Boldin separated from the ball around the Cane 30 by the only corner that doesn’t go on to a pro career – Leonard Myers. Though I think he might have gone on to a recurring role on Curb Your Enthusiasm

- Snoop catches a pass at 31-yard line (he ain’t leavin ‘til six in the morning) and the clock runs down inside ten seconds so the Noles call timeout and bring in the field goal unit.

- I don’t want to watch this.

 - Last time I saw this play, I ended up in a heap on the floor, if that gives you some idea what happens on this kick.

- Naturally, the kick is pushed wide right. A decade later and it still hurts. 

- Yadda, yadda, yadda a bunch of meaningless babbling by our hosts to end the show. Again, not bitter.

- As they note, the Noles got the last laugh on the Canes when they ended up in the Orange Bowl playing for the National title against some crappy team from the tornado belt.

Ironically, we are in the same boat this year. A couple months after this painful loss, the Noles will again play the Oklahoma Sooners.

Let’s just hope my little act of penance today is enough to change the result of the OU game this time.

The hardest thing in the world is to recognize the end of something before it happens. In retrospect it is easy to look back and say ‘yep, The Cosby Show really went downhill when they brought on Raven Symone’. But did we know it at the time? Did we assume instead, she would step into Rudy’s shoes and things would continue on as if nothing changed?

Or that Steve Guttenberg leaving the franchise after completing Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol, would represent the beginning of the end. Both of that movie franchise and Guttenberg’s career?

In sports it is even more difficult. Look at the Patriots. They were 2 minutes from NFL immortality and then a career back-up made a miracle catch and a perennially underperforming number one draft pick quarterback threw a touchdown pass to a wide receiver who would later shoot himself in the leg. Eight minutes into their next game, Tom Brady’s ACL took out the eye of some kid sitting in the third row. With that the Patriots dynasty ended.

In college football, changes seem to come even more frequently and without warning.

With the rumors and news circulating today, I have the feeling we are again at the crossroads and a team many see as invincible is beginning the slippery slide into mediocrity. After a short decade on top of the college football world, we could be looking at the end of USC’s reign.

News this week of potential sanctions against USC including reduced scholarships and possible banishment from bowl games would seem to imperil USC’s ability to annually recruit one of the best classes in the country. Combined with Pete Carroll’s leaving for the money and autonomy of the head coaching job with the Seahawks (which looks more and more convenient by the day) and being replaced by Lane Kiffin who has accomplished nothing but tick off every fan base he has worked for and it is very easy to see the Trojan program going the way of Desperate Housewives: still technically around but not of importance to anyone not receiving a check to help produce it.

It is easy to forget now that USC is not pre-ordained to always be great at college football. For pretty much the entire decade of the nineties they were average at best, going 68-49-4 from 1990 to 1999 and piling up records of 6-6, 6-5, and 6-6 in 1996, 1997 and 1999.

But USC’s impending spiral into also-ran status is certainly not unique in college football. They aren’t even the only once-dominant program taken down in part by rampant NCAA infractions.

Miami’s domination of college football came to end in the early 1990’s with two national championship game losses in 3 years followed by their own NCAA sanctions (including scholarship reductions and banishment from playing in a bowl game). Miami disappeared off the national scene for nearly a decade and after a brief dominant stretch in the early 2000’s is again mired in mediocrity.

Oklahoma dominated college football through the 70′s and 80′s but after massive misconduct was found including a shooting, a rape and selling cocaine all out of the football dorm (which makes Reggie Bush’s taking money to pay for his parent’s home almost seem honorable). The Sooners were hit with (wait for it) scholarship reductions and banishment from TV and bowl games. The Sooners would not return to the national stage until 2000 and would so harm a young impressionable fan named Turner that he would choose to attend SMU when he finished high school.

Not all dominant stretches end thanks to rampant cheating though. Others end due to coaching changes. Interesting that this also has hit USC: they are the failing program perfect storm with Kiffin playing the Mark Wahlberg role staring up at the tidal wave about to send him to the bottom of the sea.

Alabama’s Bear Bryant retired in 1982. A decade later, the Tide finally made it back to and won a national championship.

Lou Holtz left Notre Dame in 1996. Not-so-coincidentally, the Fighting Irish have been irrelevant ever since. Despite the best efforts of the media.

Tom Osborne retired in 1997 after winning three national titles in 4 years. He was succeeded by Frank Solich who so infuriated the Husker faithful by having the audacity to go 9-3 in 2003 he was fired. Also in 2003 the final Matrix films were released. And since 2003, both the Huskers and Keanu Reeves have accomplished about the same amount. Which is to say not much.

Other eras just end with little warning and the compounding effect of several seemingly small events.

The Seminoles of Florida State, in 2000, fresh off 3 consecutive national title game appearances (and 5 in nine years), lost Mark Richt as their offensive coordinator and kicked presumptive starting quarterback Jared Jones off the team. They started the next season ranked in the top five. Needless to say, they didn’t stay there and have barely sniffed it since.

Did we Nole fans know at the time that the 13-2 loss to the Sooners in the 2001 Orange Bowl would be the end of our ownership of college football? Of course not. We had endured national championship losses before and naturally assumed we would bounce right back the following season.

That was a decade ago and we are still waiting.

Are you paying attention Trojans?