Tomorrow morning, Turner and I jump on the private profootballblogger.com jet and head down to OKC, so my hatred is a little focused on one particular team this week, even if certain Hawkeye fans didn’t join me on this bandwagon. It is hard to worry about any other games or teams around the country with this epic collision less than two days away.
Anyway, with my eyes set on the Game in Norman on Saturday, I am having trouble spreading the hate. So, let’s turn that frown outside down and ac-cen-tuate a positive. You may be able to discern my picking criteria barring you didn’t go to the only school laughed at by the remedial classes at DeVry. Also known as the University of Oklahoma.
Turner: I’m sorry but I can’t do an intro tonight. Besides my physical ailments, I’m just depressed heading into this weekend of football. Painkillers, the fear of alcohol and my team sucking, it is just draining. I really just look forward to a good weekend with my dear friend Super Dave and may the best team wearing Crimson and Cream win.
Shadow: Well, after rendering “The Decision” I have found myself to be on an island of solitude and have become an object of hate myself for SD and Turner. Perhaps next year they will simply let the game in Florida be picked by “Bubby the Wonder Rat”. Looking forward to a big second weekend of college football with Iowa having its annual rivalry game with those Cyclones, and watching the OU/FSU game trying to catch a peek of our intrepid blogster and his pal in the stands. I asked SD to go to the game in full Chief Osceola regale so I can pick him out easier, but not sure if he is going to comply. Especially after I did not pick his Seminoles. On to this week’s slate of hate.
College:
Penn State @ Bama
SD: Alabama last played Oklahoma in an early season game in 2002. OU won and featured both Nate Hybil and Jason White playing quarterback for OU (an eerie preview of the afternoon shift at the Norman Best Buy this Sunday afternoon when Jason will manage the registers and Nate will oversee big screen TVs). Penn State played my Noles in two bowls in the last couple decades. Losing to the Noles in 1990 and then beating the Noles in triple-OT in the 2006 Orange Bowl. I would hold a grudge but FSU didn’t deserve to be in a BCS bowl that year and they nearly (should have) beat a Penn State team whose fans until a late season loss thought they deserved a shot at the national title. That kind of naivety is kind of endearing. Go Fighting Paternos.
Turner: Painful choice, dislike for Jo Pa and Saban, dislike for fan bases and generally every category. Let’s just go to the default, if I were to attend a game in January at either location, which would I prefer? Bama of course. Blondes in white / red t-shirts vs. Brunette’s in large puffy jackets. Roll Tide.
Shadow: Pretty easy to believe that Joe Pa probably thinks he is heading down to face Bear Bryant. At least Bobby B. left with a little dignity intact. Joe Pa really should have stepped down years ago. But, as easy as it is to hate on a Big-10 rival of the Hawkeyes, I always reserve a healthy dose of hate for whomever the current champion is, and so the Crimson Tide and their slimeball coach make me see crimson this year. I will put my support in Linebacker (and RB bust) U.
Oregon @ Tennessee
SD: In 2006, Oregon beat Oklahoma thanks to the worst piece of officiating ever seen not involving a World Cup referee. At the time, I was appalled; today, I love it. Tennessee on the other hand beat my Seminoles in the inaugural 1998 BCS title game. Go Ducks!
Turner: How can a Dooley coach the Volunteers? That is like saying a Stoops brother is going to coach at FSU. Oh, wait, hmmmmm. Traitor. The fluorescent Yellow is always better than that shade of orange they parade out in Knoxville. Duck go quakkkkky this weekend.
Shadow: Ducks jettison a QB of questionable character and the Vols lose a coach of questionable character. I think only one of these teams is truly improved by these changes. I also have a healthy dose of hate for Oregon because I think they leaped way too many spots in the polls this week, just by beating up on a crappy New Mexico team. Looks like after I get done singing Boomer Sooner, I will need to break into Rocky Top. Go Vols.
NFL:
Falcons @ Steelers
SD: The Steelers have 2 Seminoles on their roster. The Falcons also have 2 Seminoles but balance that excellence with 2 Sooners. Nice try, Falcons. I can respect balance but not as much as the Seminole love emanating out of Pittsburgh. My guess is that Big Ben likes having all those Seminoles around just to introduce him to FSU co-eds but I find it is best to not too many questions of Big Ben lest I too get dragged into a backroom. Go Steelers.
Turner: How can one not like ATL? I use to hate on Vick but those dawg-days are long gone. I’m so sick of Head and Shoulder’s commercials and listing to the apologies and now the revered Big Ben who has transformed himself into the future Tim Tebow is sickening. Matt Ryan, America’s stereotypical QB has to get the love this week.
Shadow: I think SD teed up this week’s NFL THH so I don’t have to write anything. I hate Pittsburgh. For more info, please see 2010 THH Intro Blog. Thanks.
Bengals @ Patriots
SD: The Bengals have two Sooners on their team. The Patriots initially appeared to have no Sooners or Seminoles on their roster but after the Broncos grievous mistake of waiving Seminole and PFB favorite Tony Carter, the Patriots picked him up. The team to pick up TC versus a team with two Sooners and no Noles? No contest. If this game were a car accident, the Patriots would be a multi-millionaire married to a super model who walks away and plays in a football practice that afternoon while the Bengals would be a dude with a bloody head that had to be pried from his car by the jars of life and taken to the hospital.
Turner: Not sure how SuperDave put Cincy on the list. I feel an explosion with Moss, TO and Ocho on the field together this week. Thank goodness that Wes Welker (product of Oklahoma City) will be there to display real character. The real question is how long till the explosion occurs, 3 quarters, two games, the whole season? I put it at 3.25 games. I have a bit of love for NE this year, only due to one word (ok two words)… FANTASY and BRADY. I need to ride that pony all season long and I can’t start it out with Hate. (just like Brady shouldn’t hate the Jets, that is not nice to use that H word).
Shadow: Please see above entry. I hate NE. The only thing stopping me from wishing Mop Top had actually broken his leg in the car accident today is the fact that Turner drafted him in fantasy, and I don’t want him to face the same thing I faced 2 years ago with wasting a pick on a Brady who saw no real action. Pretty sure Cincy’s egos can’t possibly all fit in their locker room, but will cheer them on this weekend anyway.
Well, that is the end of our abbreviated THH to celebrate week #1 of the NFL and week #2 of the college kids so Turner and I can head on south to Oklahoma. If you are in Norman, let us know (unless your name is Nate Hybil or Jason White). If not, check back next week for a re-cap of our big weekend. You can also get real-time updates (and more frequently, real-time Oklahoma jokes) from me all weekend on twitter (@pfbsuperdave). For the Sooner perspective you can check in with Turner (@jturn91). He has one of those fancy phones so he might even be able to Tweet pictures as the tears stream down his face into his Landry Jones Memorial moustaches at the end of the game.
